Handsome - nice to look at or irresistable?

[GOK]

Following on from this:

(Referencing Poirot)

But what shocks most people is that he's not described as being particularily handsome.

But what is a handsome man? Is it merely that he is good looking, has a good body, looks great in his clothes, is well dressed...or a combination of all of these?

I suspect that Cary Grant would still be handsome even in a potato sack, whereas Shane McGowan would still look horrendous even with a shave, good haircut and the best Savile Row suit!

Is handsome a subjective term or is there a formula? If a man is considered handsome, does it automatically make him sexually attractive? Or is there something else? I'm sure we've all had crushes/fancied men who are not handsome or in some cases, even good looking but have had that je ne sais quois, so what is it about a man that makes him irresistable? And what makes him handsome yet not alluring?

Mel Gibson is a handsome man but I am not in the slightest bit attracted to him, and the same goes for George Clooney. Conversely, Jeff Goldblum and John Malkovich are not (IMO) handsome or even particularly good looking, yet they are highly attractive.

The Golden Era spawned many handsome men, most of whom I am not remotely attracted to yet I appreciate their good looks.

So what is it? Personality along with elegance, wit, intelligence and looks? Or is there something else?

Spill the beans ladies!

 

[Kim_B]

I think it depends on who the "handsome" man in question is, and who is determining if he is in fact handsome.

I find George Clooney handsome because of the whole package - he's smart, he's good looking, he dresses well, and he does good things with his celebrity. You also don't hear much gossip about him, which is refreshing.

Brad Pitt is a different kind of handsome; he is more good looking than anything. Eye candy, I suppose; too much gossip though. That's a big turn-off.

Men like Hugh Laurie I suppose are handsome because of rugged, manly looks - that unshaven face and macho "I'm too manly to be nice!" attitude he portrays on House makes many women swoon. I'm more attracted to his real-life self, but I think it's the accent

I agree with you about Mel Gibson - he's handsome, but I'm not attracted to him (granted his recent run-in with the law leaves a lot to be desired!)

Another man I find handsome - Russel Crowe. Just don't make him mad, or he'll chuck a phone at you!

 

[GOK]

Funny, I don't think of Pitt as handsome. Nice looking yes, but not actually handsome. And Crowe I don't get at all. To me, he is anti-handsome. I find him such a turn off!

Then there's Johnny Depp - a stunningly, gorgeously, wonderfully beautiful man (you can tell I like him a lot, eh?) but not handsome. Totally irresistable though. And Jason Isaacs - sex on a stick but is he really handsome? I'll have to give that one some special consideration after I've watched State Within!

I think it depends on who the "handsome" man in question is, and who is determining if he is in fact handsome.

This is kind of what I was getting at - is it purely in the eye of the beholder or is there a tick list somewhere that defines what is handsome about a man? I'm not saying the kind of man that makes you go all gooey (although the two are by no means mutually exclusive) but handsome in the generally accepted sense. What makes a man handsome as opposed to say, merely good looking?

 

[Kim_B]

Well, I guess you'd have to start by looking at the difinition of the word Handsome...

Main Entry: hand¬?some
Pronunciation: 'han(t)-s&m
Function: adjective
Inflected Form(s): hand¬?som¬?er; -est
Etymology: Middle English handsom easy to manipulate
1 chiefly dialect : APPROPRIATE, SUITABLE
2 : moderately large : SIZABLE <a painting that commanded a handsome price>
3 : marked by skill or cleverness : ADROIT
4 : marked by graciousness or generosity : LIBERAL <handsome contributions to charity>
5 : having a pleasing and usually impressive or dignified appearance

Also defining the word attractive:

Main Entry: at¬?trac¬?tive
Pronunciation: &-'trak-tiv
Function: adjective
1 : having or relating to the power to attract <attractive forces between molecules>
2 a : arousing interest or pleasure : CHARMING <an attractive smile> b : APPEALING <an attractive offer>

By these definitions, I find George Clooney and Russel Crow to be both handsome and attractive, but find Brad Pitt and Johnny Depp attractive. I really think "beauty is in the eye of the beholder."

 

[LadyStardust]

I'm the same way. I have different, specific classifications on levels of male attractiveness. Some men can ben "gorgeous" but not "handsome", "sexy" but not "gorgeous", and so on and so forth. For example, I find Jimmy Stewart handsome, but if I had ever met him, I wouldn't be able to see him any other light except platonic, because even if it was just the characters, he was always so wholesome and soft. I distinguish based on what specific mix of personality and looks the man has.[huh]

 

[mysterygal]

I think there are times where it is a case of 'in the eye of the beholder'!. A big aspect is charisma, or having 'it'. Like George Clooney for example, he's overflowing with it!
I can look at a guy on the street and think that he's good looking as a passing thought, but, for a man to be 'intriguing', it's all about personality. I've happened across many a hunky men who had the IQ of 10 or were just plain full of themselves and jerks....this is the BIGGEST turnoff possible. To me, they become instantly unattractive. I don't mean men need to be geniouses (sp?) but I need a man to have a engaging conversation with.

 

[Elaina]

I think it's the eye of the beholder too. I can look at Clooney, Pitt, Crowe and Depp and agree they're okay looking, but I don't find them either attactive or particulalry handsome.

I've always found men that weren't considered attractive or handsome to be so to me. Growing up, my mother used to wonder what was wrong with me, since I had a crush on John Ritter and Buster Keaton. Then when Superman came out, I didn't like Superman, but Clark Kent (although ironically, I don't find Christopher Reeves attractive either, but my husband looks like him), still find Weird Al Yankovich adorable, and then really got into Christopher Lambert. My taste in men has always leaned towards dorky, funny men over what is typically considered attractive. But I also readily concede I prefer men in glasses and pocket protectors over blonde beefcakes. For me, I find that an intellectual stimulant is far more pleasing then eye candy. And typically the "cuter" a man is the less they rely on their intellegence. (Now while I'm sure the men mentioned in the first paragraph are quite intellegent, say Brad Pitt and him being smart isn't the first thing that comes to mind. Being naked and glorious in Troy does.)

My .02 for the nerds of the world.

 

[Viola]

I have different categories:

Classically handsome: Denzel Washington, Brad Pitt, Johnny Depp, a young Robert Redford or Paul Newman. Good bone structure, whole package, very sexy.

Pretty: Very good looking (sometimes too girly for me) but no sexual attraction at all. Brad Paisley, Usher, Ashton Kutchner. Unfortunately, the population of these guys seems to be growing.

Rugged: You would never talk about this guy's cheekbones or anything, but he's still very good-looking. Action heroes and cowboys. Tom Selleck, Sam Elliot, Bruce Willis, Trace Adkins.

Ugly-Sexy: I don't even know WHAT these guys have, but gosh, they've got it! Bogart, Ron Perlman, Steve Tyler.

 

[Grantgirl]

Interesting topic!

I honestly cannot come up with ONE modern actor that I would consider having the sex appeal of a Rock Hudson or a Cary Grant. I think it is more about exuding manliness, maybe being a little taller, fit, and that IT factor that you just can't take your eyes off of.

I think with the older hollywood actors if you liked Cary Grant, you wanted to see ALL of his movies. I can't come up with anyone that isn't so over exposed today. I mean honestly when you see them pick their nose on a street corner in the latest tabloid rag it is somewhat of a turnoff.

 

[katiemakeup]

Good question GOK! I think it depends on the man- and your reaction to him. Every woman has a different response and different definition for all these things... I think it's almost impossible to describe unless you are in the moment.

Such as, a man may be handsome but not sexy- to me, handsome in this sense is aesthetic where as the sexy is more internal, instinctual, animal. Who here hasn't gone ga-ga over some handsome man then after spending some time with him thought differently?

So many physical labels (gorgeous, cute, hot, handsome, beautiful, sexy...) Can a man really encompass all? Yes the outside is what usually attracts you to a person, but I am all for the character of a man.

 

[ITG]

Ugly-Sexy!!!! Hahaa, I'm sorry but I thought this was a funny description. I'd put Kramer (from Seinfeld) in that category.

I've heard of studies being done that show that women's attraction level to a guy can change depending on where their hormone levels are each month. For instance, when they are at a time in their cycle where they are more fertile, they are attracted to guys with strong jaw lines. When they are producing less hormones they find guys with more pretty features more attractive. Not sure how true this is but I found it interesting.

 

[imoldfashioned]

Trying to answer this question I kept coming back to parsing out handsome vs. attractive/sexy. As an example, I thought People Magazine's Sexiest Man Alive issue handled this in an interesting manner. I just happen to have my issue here (research only people, just research!).

Cover boy George Clooney is like the poster boy for the handsome man in my opinion both physically (regular features, great grooming and dress sense) and personality (Flirtatious, courtly, smart) and yet I'm not attracted to him. The modern guys who make me into a squeally fangirl were all in the "surprise" category--Stephen Colbert, Jon Stewart, Tim Gunn (yeah, I know he's gay but I still love him), because isn't it surprise to the mainstream media that man with glasses or grey hair could be sexy?

I think handsome is physical, but attractive is everything else (personality, humor, grooming, dress). A handsome man can be unattractive. An man who isn't handsome can be attractive. And then there's that elusive quality of chemistry. Interesting topic.

 

[Novella]

This is a tougher question to answer than I thought it would be. I think it's a very subjective label. For me it's a combination of things. I think it's a rare occasion that I'd apply the label handsome on someone in real life unless I had more to go by than simply seeing a face. Moviestar types can be handsome, but it's a superficial handsome, not a whole package handsome. And whole package handsome trumps superficial handsome.

 

[mysterygal]

Such as, a man may be handsome but not sexy- to me, handsome in this sense is aesthetic where as the sexy is more internal, instinctual, animal. Who here hasn't gone ga-ga over some handsome man then after spending some time with him thought differently?

Absolutely! Some men are good for being eye candy, but that's as far as it goes.
It would make a lot of sense that us as females would choose a guy with an instinctual mindset....we are the one's who reproduce, so it would make sense not wanting the man who is only interested in how good his hair looks.

 

[GOK]

Such as, a man may be handsome but not sexy- to me, handsome in this sense is aesthetic where as the sexy is more internal, instinctual, animal. Who here hasn't gone ga-ga over some handsome man then after spending some time with him thought differently?

Gosh that is so true. As a teen there was a lad I really fancied but once I got talking to him, I realised he was possibly the most loathsome creature I'd met in a long, long time. Ugh.

Absolutely! Some men are good for being eye candy, but that's as far as it goes.

So true, Caroline. But I have to add the disclaimer that beefcakes (IMO) are not even good for that! lol

It would make a lot of sense that us as females would choose a guy with an instinctual mindset....we are the one's who reproduce, so it would make sense not wanting the man who is only interested in how good his hair looks.

:eusa_clap

ITG - I read that too. In fact, there is an interactive article on the BBC website that goes into this. We are far more at the mercy of our genetic programming than some of us would like to admit, I suspect!

 

[JazzBaby]

Ugly-Sexy: I don't even know WHAT these guys have, but gosh, they've got it! Bogart, Ron Perlman, Steve Tyler.

You forgot Sinatra

 

[melankomas]

i've always taken handsome as related to impressive and dignified. the beautiful and the handsome do not exclude each other, in my opinion, but do not necessarily occur together. i've seen more handsome people who are not beautiful than i've seen handsome people who are beautiful, in my opinion. but my opinion isn't very educated in such things... [huh]

 

[Viola]

You forgot Sinatra

Gosh, I did!

They've all got great voices (Perlman's and Bogart's speaking voices) and interesting faces, that's for sure. And they're...manly.

-Viola

 

[BegintheBeguine]

All the young dudes

Trying to answer this question I kept coming back to parsing out handsome vs. attractive/sexy. As an example, I thought People Magazine's Sexiest Man Alive issue handled this in an interesting manner. I just happen to have my issue here (research only people, just research!).

Cover boy George Clooney

I reserched this issue, too. Well, I was in the library! Something I was pleased about was that they actually picked a man over age 40. Now, I am usually attracted to men young enough to be my son but am open to making an exception.
I seriously doubted they would ever choose a woman over age 40 for Sexiest Woman Alive, but that's fftopic:

 

[Faye Valentine]

Speaking of handsome...

I've seen trailers for the new movie "The Good German." No one has to agree but I must say, Tobey Mcguire looks awfully handsome in a uniform and out of that spidey suit (Never really paid attention to his "appeal" before seeing these trailers).

Oh, what a uniform can do to a man...