Elegance and vintage

[Miss 1929]

I don't want to be OT, but this reminds me of when my aunt told me that when she was young, people who were traveling (especially on a plane) dressed in their best clothing. Nowadays it's sweats and flip flops.

Well, nowadays if you aren't wearing sweats and flip flops on the plane, you have to take almost everything off to get through security.
My husband and I always love to dress up to travel, and now it is just too much of a chore - vintage buttons have metal, hairpins are metal, shoes have metal - it takes forever to get in the darn plane!

Note to Carey - please don't shorten that gorgeous dress. Notice that there is the same distance from the bottom of the diagonal to the hem as there is to the waist - it is proportionate the way it is and will not be if you shorten it. If you must, at least leave the extra fabric inside so it can be restored if you ever let it go...shortened vintage is my pet peeve (and I'm not even tall!). XO S

 

[MissAmelina]

I concur! That length is flattering where it is!

 

[cecil]

Well, nowadays if you aren't wearing sweats and flip flops on the plane, you have to take almost everything off to get through security.
My husband and I always love to dress up to travel, and now it is just too much of a chore - vintage buttons have metal, hairpins are metal, shoes have metal - it takes forever to get in the darn plane!

So true!!

I'm flying internationally on Monday and can't wear a vintage dress because of the metal zip but I can't wear something daggy and my doc martens (my slob outfit) because they've got steel caps. lol

I'm thinking a nice pair of slacks and shoes that SLIP OFF! hahaha.

Re: the original topic, while I'd love to see people's manners improve I think it's great that people can dress however they want to and get away with it, so long as they don't get all het up at me for being more neatly put-together* than they are. I spent a good many years wearing birds nest hair, plaid miniskirts and ripped fishnets. I copped alot of flak for it from people older than me and I'll be damned if I'm going to turn into as much as a disdainful stick-in-the-mud to kids that are wearing the same thing today. Vive la différence, I say!

*notice I didn't say better dressed? I may generally be the only girl in the room wearing a hat and a black crepe dress but I wouldn't dare call someone better dressed than me if they've obviously put as much time and thought into their get-up as I had. The next girl has probably put as much effort into her lank supermodel hair and smudgy makeup as I have into my curls and lippie, it's not my place to judge her for being modern. That, in my opinion, is a polite and elegant way to behave.

 

[Shirin]

"The term common decency comes to mind. I don't know that it actually means anything today, but I like to throw it around"
I use this term a lot, and I've actually had a few guys who were same age as me ask me what that meant! I could not believe it

"I understand what you're saying. I live in Astoria, and I like to dress up when I go to the movies. It reminds me of a more elegant time, when people were polite enough to want to look nice at the movies. I recently went to see Coraline 3-D, and was asked by people in the line, as well as the woman who sold me my popcorn, "Whatchoo so dressed up for?"
My sis and I dressed up in matching sheath dresses (red, but simple) and the boy at Starbucks asked us if we were going to a wedding. We said, Noooo, we just feel lovely in a dress.
I just smiled and said, "It feels nice". I actually got some EYE ROLLS from that.
Why the eye rolls? It made me feel so embarrassed, and then I reminded myself that THEY should feel embarrassed, not I."
If I saw them eye rolling me I would have said something about thier attire!

"I have actually gone to the symphony and sat next to people wearing sweat pants.Now, maybe they like music and can't afford a suit, who knows? "
My husband and I went to see an Italian play and I saw people young and old, walking into the theater with commando pants (the kind with lots of pockets and zippers)/jeans and polo shirts! Yuck! I just think its inconsiderate honestly.

"I like to dress up for parties, and i find it awkward sometimes to be the only person at a Christmas party that bothered to put on a dress"
I've also had this experience, My last boss lives in a very rich classy part of town and every year he has a Christmas party at his house. Two years ago I bought a very lovely black satin strapless dress with embroidery and a sequined/laced bolero to cover up a bit with. I (besides my sis who also wore a floor length black gown) were the only females there who looked like they belong at a Christmas dinner party! The other gals were in these short casual knitwear dresses that you would wear to the mall. Even the bosses wife was dressed down in dress slacks and a sparkly blouse. When she saw us she was expressing how lovely we looked and that this was the first year she decided not to wear a dress because her guests were coming in so casual! Now this was not some kind of formal affair, but a dinner party definitely reads semi-formal to me.

"dressing nicely when others don't reminds them that they look sloppy, and people react to that."
Sooooo true! I was also thinking this while reading the posts.

 

[ShoreRoadLady]

ChanteuseCarey, that's a beautiful - and very elegant - dress!

I think elegance, then as now, can be difficult to achieve. On the whole, they may have been more polite and well-dressed back then (such as wearing appropriately dressy clothes for occasions), but there were plenty of un-elegant people. Women who didn't know what skirt lengths fit them best, who had to buy cheap ready-to-wear and didn't alter it, who didn't know their best colors, or who walked around wearing all the latest trends in one outfit!

 

[Lauren]

Agreed, ShoreRoadLady! It's quite fun to look glamourous and elegant, but many women did not or could not. It's kind of inspiring all on it's own, actually, to look through old snapshots at antique stores and on ebay and see what women of different stations of life wore. And just like today, just because you had money didn't necessarily mean you knew how to dress yourself in flattering clothing! lol The history of clothing and society is just so fascinating!

 

[Foofoogal]

The history of clothing and society is just so fascinating!

I so agree Lauren. The history of anything vintage fascinates me.

FYI: flip flops on a plane are dangerous. It is even in the airplane manuals to not wear them.

http://www.foofoogal.etsy.com

 

[Penny Dreadful]

I wouldn't want people to change completely either, the vain part of me likes knowing I look better than the people around me, and I do agree it's great that we live in a world of choice. However the issue for me here is respect, especially when it comes to weddings and shows such as the symphony or a play. When you go to a wedding you have been asked to be a part of the biggest day in someone's life. To show up looking like you put no more thought or effort into your outfit than you would if you were doing chores around the house is something I find extremely rude and insulting. You're basically sending the message with your clothing that their very special day is of no significance to you. Likewise for shows, the people part of that show put in a LOT of hard work, years even, to make sure you would be impressed and entertained. It's the least you can do as an audience member to put some effort into your appearance. There is a world of choice available to people besides jeans and sweats that not only looks good, but is perfectly comfortable too. The idea that you have to be uncomfortable to look nice confuses the hell out of me.
As far as people who dress down because they're afraid they won't fit in, WUSSES! lol
When I had my wedding social (a kind of fundraiser common in Manitoba) I was asked a lot what the dress code would be since it was happening so close to halloween. Since I was inviting people of such varied backrounds I told everyone "DON'T try to fit in. You will not. I want everyone to wear what makes THEM feel good, whether it be casual/formal, costume/not. Have fun with it!" Half the girls ended up coming in fairy wings lol it was great!

 

[Jools]

I went to a wedding this summer- I wore a (non-vintage) silk suit, with a beautiful hat, and silk/lace shoes. The two girlfriends of the bride's sons (2nd wedding, the "boys" were in their twenties" wore dresses so tight, so low-cut, and so short, that they could only be described as "hooker-wear." Interestingly enough, both girls spent the reception trying to pull the skirts down and the necklines up.

I do go to the opera, and at least on opening nights, the vast majority of the women are in long gowns, and the men in tuxes OR tails. Hardly a pair of jeans to be seen.

It has become the ubiquitous uniform of the vast majority. I remember walking through the Salt Lake City airport, and suddenly realizing that people were turning around to look at me....I wondered if my skirt was tucked into my stockings, or I was trailing toilet paper...And then I realized that I was the ONLY woman IN the airport wearing a skirt...and NOT wearing jeans, tennis shoes, and a sweatshirt.

I find that I get much better service pretty much every where I go, when I am dressed nicely, than when I am not. I suppose it is because MOST people dress as if they might wash the dog at any moment, and when someone dressed nicely comes into their shop/restaurant, they think I might be a better tipper.

 

[Amy Jeanne]

I don't think how you dress is the problem the majority of the time, as long as you're polite. Alot of people seem to think that unless you're dressed "properly" (whatever that means), that you can't be a nice person, or a polite person with manners.

This is the comment I most agree with.

 

[sheeplady]

I try not to judge people too much by what they wear. I realize, that unlike me, some people do physical work for a living. If you do not have the skills to mend or cannot afford the nice clothes in the store, it can be difficult to dress nicely. I don't begrudge someone stopping by the store or the bank on their way home from work and wearing their work clothes. I've met some very unagreeable people in my life, and I've noticed that rudeness does not correlate with clothes.

I really hate tellers and customer service individuals who treat customers differently based upon how they are dressed. If I am doing business with a bank or store, you should treat me the same if I turn up in flannel/ jeans or a suit. I really think it is unprofessional to do otherwise. One of my favorite tests of a new bank or store is to go in to the same clerk or teller in different clothes. If they treat me badly because I am wearing "physical work" clothes, they just lost my business. Needless to say that this has happened enough (being treated differently) that it has become one of my pet peeves. I also really hate seeing someone in line in front of me dressed in their construction/ work clothes get treated badly (for no apparent reason), and then the same person behind the register is as sweet as pie to me in my dress clothes. Their money is just as good as mine.

 

[Hey_Laaaaaady!]

One of my favorite tests of a new bank or store is to go in to the same clerk or teller in different clothes. If they treat me badly because I am wearing "physical work" clothes, they just lost my business.

That reminds me of that folktale about the nobleman who came to the feast dressed well but gobbled up his food messily, and yet everyone still treated him nicely. He showed up later in rags, but with manners, and was turned away. I like what you said. It's hard *not* to judge people by their appearance, though. Something we all need to work on, especially me.