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Do You Dress For Dinner?

GrrlFriday

New in Town
My question is actually a little more broad than that. For those of you who dress vintage (and maybe even some who don't), do you follow the classic rules of what to wear when? In other words, do you wear house dresses at home, day dresses for shopping and work, afternoon dresses out to dinner or anywhere you go after 5 pm? And if you do, how does it fit in to your modern lifestyle?

I didn't see a thread like this but heaven knows, I can be blind as a bat. So please feel free to move this if it exists elsewhere.
 

SayCici

Practically Family
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813
Location
Virginia
I don't really differentiate between what's 'proper' for afternoon or evening, and my lifestyle has a lot to do with that. I don't work right now but I do go to school, so things like shopping get done when they get done - maybe in the morning or afternoon but maybe at 7pm. Groceries don't require a change of dress! When I go out to dinner, they're good restaurants but not like $100-check-for-two-people fancy. If that was the case I'd punch my outfit up a notch, but I'm already usually considered "over"-dressed by some so my looks transition into evening fine. I don't go to a lot of balls or roll with high society 30s folk. ;)

I only have one house dress, a vintage 50s one with a zipper up the front, that I don't wear out of the house (well, that's a lie - I wear it OUT of the house but not to other places).
 
D

Deleted member 12480

Guest
what a brilliant thread!

When i come home i change out of my uniform (grr) and into my comfy clothes!!
I wish i could wear clothes the way you described but i simply don't own enough yet - i'm a newbie!

But i would say that i do doll up to go for meals - even if it is just the pub down the road. I just like dressing up and i don't really mind if i'm overdressed - as long as its not severely over dressed!
 

Amy Jeanne

Call Me a Cab
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2,858
Location
Colorado
Nah. I wear House and Casual dresses to work, to shop, to the bar, wherever lol That's all I own. My grandma had 3 dresses PERIOD in the 40s so I doubt she followed those "rules."
 

Wire9Vintage

A-List Customer
Messages
411
Location
Texas
Yes, I think my grandmother's "going to town" outfit would have largely consisted of just taking off her apron in the 40s, but only because she would not have had that many clothes, and the good things would have been saved for church only (and the occassional funeral or trip to the bank or what have you). Now in later years, she was adament about dressing nicer for going to town, but, of course, she had more clothes from which to choose, and living way out in the country, it was a bit of an event to go into town and she wanted to dress for the event!

Anymore, though, a vintage day dress IS dressy simply because it's a dress. Even a vintage house dress is considered pretty dressy now. See, of course, the lovely Fleur de Guerre's style, among others.
 

December

One of the Regulars
Messages
297
Location
Hampshire, England.
I do actually do this, although not in such a structured way so it's not something I've ever thought of before.

Like Cici, I'm a student so if I'm at home I will just wear something really casual, that I wouldn't want to wear out and about.

When I leave the house I will wear a daydress or linen trousers with a jumper (the English definition- not a dress!!).

If I go out in the afternoon, to a restaurant (Well, Nando's) or something then I may be slightly more dressy, perhaps put a brighter red lipstick on or something.

If I go out in the evening, I will wear something that is more strictly evening wear- a figure hugging pencil dress with heels, for example.

Like I said though, this is on an "as and when" basis so it's not something I've thought of before. It's not something I do to follow vintage rules or whatever either, it's just how I've always dressed.
 

LizzieMaine

Bartender
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33,757
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Where The Tourists Meet The Sea
I never go out for social occasions in the evening because I work nights, so I only "dress up" if it's a special occasion at work -- an expensive concert or something. I don't wear actually wear evening clothes unless I'm actually appearing on stage as an MC. After all, it's not much fun to clean up a fountain syrup spill or lug a beer keg up from the cellar in a gown.

I do have several dresses that I only wear for housework -- they're either badly faded, torn and mended, or just worn thru and patched, and since most people I see around town know I make my own clothes, I don't want to give them the idea that this is typical of my workmanship. My everyday work clothes are cotton day dresses with a moth-nibbled-but-carefully-darned wool cardigan over them if it's cold out.

My grandmother didn't care about being seen at the neighborhood corner grocery in a housedress, but she would put on a suit to go to the supermarket over in the next town. She didn't care what people who knew her already thought about her, but she was very concerned with giving a good impression to strangers.
 

GrrlFriday

New in Town
You ladies actually already started answering the next question I had about whether or not Golden Era women actually followed these "rules" or if it was some some sort of middle-class aspirational stuff in magazines only.

My great-grandmother, with whom I was raised, did have three separate sets of clothes. Her church dresses, work/out-and-about dresses, and house dresses which were just worn-out versions of a work dress. But then, she was also a seamstress. I don't remember her being a clothes horse with tons of clothes, but I do remember that these wardrobes were always kept separate. She would come home from work or church and promptly change into a house dress. (For reference, my gran was born in 1911.)

Anyway, keep the answers coming. I'd love to know how others do/do not work this sort of routine into everyday modern life.
 

Wire9Vintage

A-List Customer
Messages
411
Location
Texas
LizzieMaine adds in important point. My grandmother, as well, would only have taken off her apron for the locals... But is she went "to town," that was another matter. She wouldn't have necessarily dressed up (in the 40s), but would have put on a "town dress." Not quite as dressy as church clothes, but nice. And that was a habit that never left her.

Now, before she was married and a mother, she would have dressed up much more so when leaving the house to go anywhere (but we're talking 1920s now). My mother, as a young woman in the late 1940s, would not have had many clothes at all, but she sewed well and would have had very nicely made things. For her, it would have been more about putting on "town shoes" as opposed to "working around the house shoes." And she would have put on make up for going anywhere, but not for home. Of course, in order to put on her red lipstick, she had to sneak it out of the house, because her father was very strict and didn't allow it. She'd clean it off before coming home!
 

Marla

A-List Customer
Messages
421
Location
USA
For me changing clothes during the day is about a sense of occasion. I treat a house dress like a house dress, and if I'm leaving the house I'll change into afternoon dress, or an evening dress if the occasion calls. I know many ladies wear the same outfit all day long, but I change several times throughout the day depending on where I will be going, but maybe that is in part due to a love of the theatrical, not just an awareness of etiquette.

As for fitting in changes of dress into a modern lifestyle, I don't encounter any impediments. I don't think it's any more difficult today to change clothes than it was in the 40s. Though considering the way the majority of the American population dresses today, it is of course deemed unnecessary and even ridiculous by them, but if you dress for yourself those sorts of opinions shouldn't faze you. Unlike in the past, the casual modern world does not require one to ever change out of one's tattered jeans.
 

kamikat

Call Me a Cab
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2,794
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Maryland
All of my dresses are cotton day dresses. I have a new pattern for a Swirl-type housedress but haven't made one yet. In my circle of friends, even a cotton housedress would be seen as dressy, so I see no need to dress up more than that. I do own one satin cocktail dress but have only worn it once, at our New Year's Eve party several years ago.

As for actual women of the Golden Age, it really depends on class. Both of my grandmothers were wives of diplomats stationed overseas. Because their husbands' careers or sometimes even the US's image could be affected by their own image, they followed all the etiquette standards for their station.
 

Fleur De Guerre

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2,056
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Walton on Thames, UK
As mentioned above, I've banged on a bit in various columns etc, about how, despite loving an authentic look, I do wear my cotton house dresses everywhere in the summer - round the house, out to the local shops, up to London, for afternoon tea or out for an all day event... even women who only had 3 or 4 dresses would have had smarter ones for trips further away. But house dresses look so, so much smarter than anything you can buy in the shops now, and I have no qualms at all about wearing them out and about.

I do however believe in dressing properly for events like balls, but not from any sense of propriety, rather that the opportunities to attend such things are so few and far between! Where else am I going to wear my floor-length 30s gowns! And I like to wear smarter, more evening-y/cocktaily dresses to nights out. But only because I can!

I am currently sitting in a full-length cotton housecoat, funnily enough, but when I am holed up all day working, I am usually wearing something ragged and modern, covered with cat hair! lol
 

SugarKitten

One of the Regulars
Messages
127
Location
New England
I loved this question, and couldn't wait to hear all the answers. Most of all, I love how wide the range of answers are even if most could have gone with a "not really" or some such.

I generally mix vintage pieces, and as much as I wish, I don't have enough of it to really do separate for every occasion/outing. However, I wear "work clothes" and change when I get home into something more fun - not always something less dressy. I live in a downtown, and not getting back in the car when I get home is one of the reasons I moved from my old place. What that all means is, I am actually, somewhat accidentally, developing a "town" look, different from work, or "home" - which is pretty cool!

My family was pretty traditional, so any sort of "family event" like a dinner out, or a lesser way, dinner home, was an event, so maybe not a change of clothes but nothing inappropriate like workout clothes or wet hair or something like that.

As far as my grandmother, the was a *strict* dresser! Even in her late-60s and early 70s, she'd dress up all the way, including foundation garments to go to work (I know, I used to be asked to do her garter snaps!). Every day she got home and changed into house clothes. I was not there for the days she still lived in Brooklyn, but she made it very clear one didn't go out of the house not dressed to be seen. She was a bit vain, and loved her dressing up, so I think it was in part for a chance to show off her style at every chance.
 

Viola

Call Me a Cab
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2,469
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NSW, AUS
I have "after six" things. Velvet dresses, etc. feel pretty silly worn just 'coz. Heels get higher, peep-toes may appear, and stuff like that, for even out to dinner at a pretty simple place because I think it is cute (and often in pieces more classic or vintage-inspired type cocktail dresses, I'm not talking evening gowns) and I don't wear that stuff to just go to work or around during the day because I'd feel a fool.

By day I might just wear a very soft makeup - concealer, chapstick, soft eyes and lips, naturalistic if not actually natural, I do wear red lips sometimes but sort of soft reds.

To go out at night my makeup can be a bit more saturated and not look silly. Smoky eyes tend to look trying-to-hard, on me, by day.
 

Amy Jeanne

Call Me a Cab
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2,858
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Colorado
My grandma told me she had three dresses total in the 40s -- 2 made from feedsacks and one "Sunday" dress. She also told me she had two pairs of shoes -- 1 for everyday and 1 for "Sunday." When her everyday shoes wore out, her "Sunday" shoes became her everyday shoes and then she'd buy a nice new pair of shoes for "Sunday."

She was on the farmin' side of my family, though. My grandmother on my dad's side died before I was born, but I have lots of pics of her from the 1920s posing in the latest fashions and she had WELL over 3 dresses :D That can factory must've paid good!

Even though I can today, I don't follow any type of dressing rules from the past. I wear cute house and day dresses like it's a religion. I wear them EVERYWHERE. And since I make them, they are unique and I'd like them to last as long as they can. Changing them 3 times a day would just wear them out faster and create more laundry (that I really can't afford to do!)
 

Tourbillion

Practically Family
Messages
667
Location
Los Angeles
I really wanted to make a snarky reply to this thread, but I don't want to get banned. I did Google "naturalist dinner" and found appropriate photos, but I really do wear clothes for dinner. Seriously, people could lose their appetite.

Obviously I dress a bit better for dinner at Cicada than for the taco stand around the corner. The thing is that I would feel stupid in an evening gown and my boyfriend in a dinner jacket having dinner in the kitchen at home.

Seriously, how many people today have formal dining rooms any more? When I was a kid we did, and we did dress for dinner on holidays or special parties--the only days we actually used the formal dining room. I just don't think that this is done any more.

However, I still remember my parents being absolutely appalled that people wore athletic wear to the mall in the 1980's. I do think that today's generation has no idea why this isn't appropriate.

I am wondering if eventually, people will dispense with clothes altogether. I am waiting for swim "suits" to be considered formal wear, along with your dress "crocs" or flip-flops.
 
D

Deleted member 12480

Guest
Tourbillion said:
Seriously, how many people today have formal dining rooms any more? When I was a kid we did, and we did dress for dinner on holidays or special parties--the only days we actually used the formal dining room. I just don't think that this is done any more.

Actually,

Me and my family eat round the dinner table every night - we have to all be there to contribute and all sit down and eat at the same time. Its nice and it actually helps you plan meals better.

:)
xxx
 

ShoreRoadLady

Practically Family
As an unemployed stuent, I don't really switch my outfits throughout the day, except to change out of my more beat-up outfits if I'm going "out" (school, shopping, etc.). When I worked, I usually swapped my work clothes for comfier, at-home clothes so the work clothes would stay nice. I don't have the wardrobe to dress like a society queen, and besides, I'd never get anything done if I changed three times a day. :)

Working girls in the '30s and '40s would have changed their outfits less than the independently wealthy society woman or stay-at-home wife. On a weekday, they might change into something appropriate for home or an evening out (I know I've seen vintage magazine articles advocating that working girls change to either a housedress or a hostess gown, IIRC, when they came home), but they wouldn't be changing at lunch into an "afternoon frock". And, like most of us (alas!) they wouldn't have many opportunities to wear an evening gown!
 

LizzieMaine

Bartender
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33,757
Location
Where The Tourists Meet The Sea
Tourbillion said:
Seriously, how many people today have formal dining rooms any more? When I was a kid we did, and we did dress for dinner on holidays or special parties--the only days we actually used the formal dining room. I just don't think that this is done any more.

This is a good point -- everybody I knew growing up ate in the kitchen. If they had a dining room at all -- and few people in our neighborhood did -- it was kept for special occasions rather than for every day. Too much work to keep clean for everyday use.

An interesting demographic note, though -- as late as the thirties, you weren't considered "middle class" unless you employed at least one servant, usually a housekeeper/cook. Not having to do their own housework no doubt made it easier for the ladies of the day to keep up with all the wardrobe changes.
 

Tourbillion

Practically Family
Messages
667
Location
Los Angeles
Annie,

Do you mean:

large_JILOTE-family-453.jpg


or

_40925866_dinner203.jpg


I would think that the latter is pretty rare. It is great that your family eats together, most don't today. Most homes in my area don't even have facilities for a formal dinner. Sometimes kitchens aren't large enough for a family table (like mine), but I don't have a real dining room. My neighbor does have a dining area, but she has to eat there unless she wants to stand up in the kitchen. Usually the formal dining room has been replaced by a breakfast nook, or a bar by the kitchen.

When I grew up, we had an informal kitchen table, where we usually ate, and a huge formal dining room similar to the second photo. If you have a larger older home you would have this, but my understanding is that even if you do have a dining room it is now more common to eat in front of the tv on the sofa or something.

I somehow doubt that formal dress figures into the equation in most modern homes regardless of where people eat.
 

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