Credo of the new Vintage Lady

[ShortClara]

Oops, I guess I'm not a NVL, since I'm 100% a feminist!

I'm with pigeon! There's nothing wrong with a little equality PLUS wanting the door held open for me. I don't want to be a man, just to be paid the same!

 

[kamikat]

Maybe my defintion of feminist isn't the same as y'all's. When I hear the word feminist, I think of women who claim to not need men in their lives, hate it when men hold the door open or push their chair in, hate women who have chosen to be stay-at-home moms as traitors to their gender, who belittle anything that might be considered "women's jobs" (ie, nursing, cosmetologists, teachers, ect), who thinks it's beneath them to cook or clean.

 

[gluegungeisha]

Maybe my defintion of feminist isn't the same as y'all's. When I hear the word feminist, I think of women who claim to not need men in their lives, hate it when men hold the door open or push their chair in, hate women who have chosen to be stay-at-home moms as traitors to their gender, who belittle anything that might be considered "women's jobs" (ie, nursing, cosmetologists, teachers, ect), who thinks it's beneath them to cook or clean.

Yeah, see, I think there's a HUGE difference between feminist, female chauvinist, man-hater, etc.

A feminist believes in equality between the sexes -- equal rights AND respect!
A feminist respects women AND men from all walks of life.
A feminist is grateful for kind gestures from anyone regardless of their sex.
A feminist pushes for women to be able to have their dream careers -- whether that consists of breaking the glass ceiling in the corporate world, or being a stay at home mom. I know PLENTY of feminist housewives...Patti Smith and Siouxsie Sioux anyone?

Feminists have been around for ages. Flappers? Suffragettes? My great-grandmother Rose was a first wave feminist; my mother was a second-wave feminist; and I intend on continuing the celebration of what women have accomplished over the generations, while still fighting for equality.

There is still so much work to be done. Why are we earning only 75 cents for every dollar a man earns, doing the same job equally well? Why are women on the other side of the world being shunned by their communities for being raped? Why are prostitutes arrested instead of the people paying them? Why, after taking years of martial arts, am I still afraid to walk the streets of my city alone after dark? Why didn't Marilyn Monroe's true-to-life intelligence sell? Why is it becoming increasingly difficult for me to get into the university of my dreams because colleges insist on letting a [now growing] number of males into schools, regardless of how many girls had better essays, test scores and GPAs (are men somehow incapacitated all of a sudden)? Why are most mainstream female radio personalities either "ditzy" or without their own jokes? Why don't I ever see any news anchorwomen over 40?

If identifying myself as a feminist disqualifies me as a NVL...count me out!

*steps off soapbox*

 

[pigeon toe]

Yeah, see, I think there's a HUGE difference between feminist, female chauvinist, man-hater, etc.

A feminist believes in equality between the sexes -- equal rights AND respect!
A feminist respects women AND men from all walks of life.
A feminist is grateful for kind gestures from anyone regardless of their sex.
A feminist pushes for women to be able to have their dream careers -- whether that consists of breaking the glass ceiling in the corporate world, or being a stay at home mom. I know PLENTY of feminist housewives...Patti Smith and Siouxsie Sioux anyone?

Feminists have been around for ages. Flappers? Suffragettes? My great-grandmother Rose was a first wave feminist; my mother was a second-wave feminist; and I intend on continuing the celebration of what women have accomplished over the generations, while still fighting for equality.

There is still so much work to be done. Why are we earning only 75 cents for every dollar a man earns, doing the same job equally well? Why are women on the other side of the world being shunned by their communities for being raped? Why are prostitutes arrested instead of the people paying them? Why, after taking years of martial arts, am I still afraid to walk the streets of my city alone after dark? Why didn't Marilyn Monroe's true-to-life intelligence sell? Why is it becoming increasingly difficult for me to get into the university of my dreams because colleges insist on letting a [now growing] number of males into schools, regardless of how many girls had better essays, test scores and GPAs (are men somehow incapacitated all of a sudden)? Why are most mainstream female radio personalities either "ditzy" or without their own jokes? Why don't I ever see any news anchorwomen over 40?

If identifying myself as a feminist disqualifies me as a NVL...count me out!

*steps off soapbox*

Beautifully said.

There's definitely a difference between feminists and man-haters. It's unfortunate that they so often get confused as being one in the same!

 

[pretty faythe]

Why are we earning only 75 cents for every dollar a man earns, doing the same job equally well? !

A lil fftopic: but, unions. I am a card carrying member of the Internation Brotherhood of Electrical Workers, Local 357. Thats part of the reason why we need to to get more unions, if we were all unionized, there is no way anyone could be paid less, whether male female, relegion, etc.
I make the same glorious wage that my fellow brothers work, get the same insurance, and when I get behind on paying on my dues, get yelled at just the same. Get the same o/t, etc. [huh]
_______________________________________________________________

 

[kamikat]

Thanks for clearing that up. Personally, I think all that you mentioned is "human rights". I never would have thought of myself as a feminist, but I certainly agree with gluegungiesha said. Back when my first was born, I was interview in Parenting magazine about leaving my career to become a stay-at-home mom. You wouldn't believe that amount of you-know-what I got from neighbors, family and just feedback printed in the magazine. Ever since then, I've always thought of feminists as people that hate being women and hate women who make different choices than they do.

 

[ShortClara]

I think kamikat, that the man-hating stereotype is perpetuated by some in order to deamean and shame the movement. I agree with gluegun completely. So, You CAN be a proud feminist and a NVL! The next time someone belittles feminists, you can set them straight!

 

[gluegungeisha]

Thanks for clearing that up. Personally, I think all that you mentioned is "human rights". I never would have thought of myself as a feminist, but I certainly agree with gluegungiesha said. Back when my first was born, I was interview in Parenting magazine about leaving my career to become a stay-at-home mom. You wouldn't believe that amount of you-know-what I got from neighbors, family and just feedback printed in the magazine. Ever since then, I've always thought of feminists as people that hate being women and hate women who make different choices than they do.

I'm really sorry that you got so much negative feedback for making a perfectly understandable choice. It is strange how some people tend to forget that it IS a choice!

 

[kamikat]

Thank you, ladies. You have given me much to think about.

 

[Mojito]

Kamikat, what a dreadful experience! Sadly not uncommon - and the flipside of the coin isn't uncommon either. My sister was condemned by other women as an inadequate, unfeminine mother because she did not entirely give up her career and continued to work part time when she had children. Both negative attitudes are reprehensible in my opinion - I believe feminism is about choice.

I think you may have encountered the Radical Feminist fringe - there are many different shades of feminism, and fortunately those who are negative and anti-male are in the minority (but often tend to attract the most notice, or - as ShortClara says - those seeking to belittle the movement sometimes characterise all feminists as man-haters). A Cultural Feminist, for instance, might show a preference for homemaking, emphasising the value of the mother-role as nurturer and educator. Gluegungeisha has beautifully expressed what many mainstream feminists feel. I'd assert and defend the right of a woman not only to pursue the career and parenting options that work best for her and her family, but also to dress according to choice.

 

[ShortClara]

Yes, Mojito, I believe it all boils down to choice. Women having choices. There is no right choice, but the having of them is the most important thing.

 

[nyx]

I was thinking about my self image recently (see the thread on the wiggle dress woes) and came to the conclusion:

A NVL knows that curves are womanly.
A NVL knows that being skinnier will not solve her problems.
A NVL knows that anyone can have the perfect vintage body--because it comes in all shapes and sizes (besides, we've got corsets to move it around to where it looks the best)

 

[Kishtu]

An NVL can take a compliment. When someone says "that was a good job" or "you are clever to be able to make your own clothes," an NVL doesn't apologise or mutter and shuffle ungraciously. An NVL will say thank you!

 

[Miss Dottie]

Yes, Mojito, I believe it all boils down to choice. Women having choices. There is no right choice, but the having of them is the most important thing.

How about this: a new vintage lady respects people's choices and are comfortable in their own.

 

[Miss Dottie]

Oh and a new vintage lady knows the importance of a thank you note.

 

[kamikat]

A NVL understands that elegance trancends dates or time periods.

I say this because I saw the most beautiful woman in Target yesterday. She was totally modern, but certainly was elegant and well dressed. She had on a cream chiffon dress, with red flowers, just below knee in front and about calf length in back, a red bolero shrug-type sweater, red strappy heels and red bag. She also had a wonderful, tidy up-do, understated gold hoops and a single bangle. Oh, yeah, her lips matched her bag, shoes and nails.

 

[Feathers]

How about this one?

An NVL understands cell-phone etiquette and refrains from using said device (or wireless/bluetooth/etc.) while at a counter/table in a public place (this includes cafes, coffee shops, restaurants, libraries, bookstores, etc...)

 

[gluegungeisha]

I was thinking about my self image recently (see the thread on the wiggle dress woes) and came to the conclusion:

A NVL knows that curves are womanly.
A NVL knows that being skinnier will not solve her problems.
A NVL knows that anyone can have the perfect vintage body--because it comes in all shapes and sizes (besides, we've got corsets to move it around to where it looks the best)

But...

A NVL also knows that being naturally tiny is also womanly, and that being curvier will not solve her problems either.

 

[nyx]

But...

A NVL also knows that being naturally tiny is also womanly, and that being curvier will not solve her problems either.

I heartily agree! (hence the "all shapes and sizes") To me, surgically enhancing your "assets" never really helps your self-esteem either. I remember watching the TV show The Swan and being horrified.

 

[gluegungeisha]

A NVL understands that elegance trancends dates or time periods.

I say this because I saw the most beautiful woman in Target yesterday. She was totally modern, but certainly was elegant and well dressed. She had on a cream chiffon dress, with red flowers, just below knee in front and about calf length in back, a red bolero shrug-type sweater, red strappy heels and red bag. She also had a wonderful, tidy up-do, understated gold hoops and a single bangle. Oh, yeah, her lips matched her bag, shoes and nails.

Ooh, I agree! I've certainly seen many modern-dressed women looking fantastically classy and well put-together.

I was also reminded of this when I was walking to school a few days ago. I was wearing an all-modern (excluding my lucite purse) ensemble, and an elderly woman tapped me on the shoulder and said "you're well put-together. I don't see that often anymore." Though my outfit was actually very casual (black capris, black short-sleeved top, mary janes), my clothes fit me properly (no muffin-tops or exposed torso whatsoever, no pantylines, no cleavage). It's amazing how much FIT does for your look.

On campus, I often see girls in clothes that wearing clothes that have potential to look very classy (button-up blouses, for instance), but the way they're worn subtracts so much from the look!

So...a NVL knows how to dress herself according to her body type, and is unashamed to purchase an item a size up if it fits better than one in a smaller size.