Clean Jokes

[Trenchfriend]

What's the difference between an minister and an husband?

The minister knows his deputy...

 

[Trenchfriend]

Doctor:
"Do you drink?"

Patient:
"Uum, very less, but often and then much."

 

[BobHufford]

 

[Doctor Damage]

 

[Doctor Damage]

 

[Trenchfriend]

Women, WOMEN?? Wait a minute...

Aah, I remember! They are these lifeforms, who wash a new bought shirt before wearing, right?

 

[Trenchfriend]

Old children joke:

RIAS (Berlin) Tanzorchester

Whose??

 

[BobHufford]

 

[Frunobulax]

A man makes his first trip to Chicago and visits the Navy Pier. He decides he wants to find out how long it is, so he measures one slat's width and the slit that separates the slats and figures, he can calculate the length of the pier by counting the slats and adding them up with the number of slits. So he begins walking out on the pier, counting the slits between the boards.

Unfortunately, he wasn't paying close attention and walked off the end of the pier after counting the last slit, tragically drowning in Lake Michigan.

The moral of the story?

"When you're out of slits, you're out of pier."

 

[Doctor Damage]

joke about the Titanic wreck: "I’ve heard that the Titanic’s pool still has water in it."

joke about the recent submersible sinking: "Great, from now on we’re going to associate the Titanic with tragedy."

 

[Rmccamey]

That's a good one, Fruno!

A man makes his first trip to Chicago and visits the Navy Pier. He decides he wants to find out how long it is, so he measures one slat's width and the slit that separates the slats and figures, he can calculate the length of the pier by counting the slats and adding them up with the number of slits. So he begins walking out on the pier, counting the slits between the boards.

Unfortunately, he wasn't paying close attention and walked off the end of the pier after counting the last slit, tragically drowning in Lake Michigan.

The moral of the story?

"When you're out of slits, you're out of pier."

 

[Turnip]

 

[BobHufford]

 

[Frunobulax]

Well, it was 1945 and the war was over. Jessie came from a Navajo reservation and joined the US Navy to fight in WWII and, with the war over, was mustering out.

Jessie went home to the reservation and, having learned and honed electrical skills during his time in the Navy, was eager to put these skills to use to help his community. The first job the Tribal Council gave Jessie was to provide electrification for a new, indoor public toilet which they were completing.

Jessie worked hard, and soon the toilet (Jessie often joked they called it "the head" in the Navy) was completed and electrified. With great pride, Jessie flipped the main switch to the building and viola! the building lit up and everything worked perfectly.

And with that, Jessie became the first Navajo to wire a head for a reservation.

 

[Turnip]

 

[Trenchfriend]

Well, it was 1945 and the war was over. Jessie came from a Navajo reservation and joined the US Navy to fight in WWII and, with the war over, was mustering out.

Jessie went home to the reservation and, having learned and honed electrical skills during his time in the Navy, was eager to put these skills to use to help his community. The first job the Tribal Council gave Jessie was to provide electrification for a new, indoor public toilet which they were completing.

Jessie worked hard, and soon the toilet (Jessie often joked they called it "the head" in the Navy) was completed and electrified. With great pride, Jessie flipped the main switch to the building and viola! the building lit up and everything worked perfectly.

And with that, Jessie became the first Navajo to wire a head for a reservation.

But what exactly was the joke in the story?

 

[Frunobulax]

But what exactly was the joke in the story?

Wiring ahead for a reservation is somewhat outdated terminology for making a hotel reservation.

 

[Trenchfriend]

THAT`S A GOOD ONE!!

 

[Turnip]

 

[Frunobulax]

I was abducted by aliens.

They made me wash my hands, eat my vegetables, and go to bed early.

Turns out I was on the mothership.