Clean Jokes

[GHT]

It is a little hard to fathom how England, a country that has led the way in so many fields, still has something as anachronic as princes, kings, and queens.

In 1605 we had a fellow, name of Guido Fawkes, or Guy Fawkes, one of nine conspirators, who attempted to blow up The King, Parliament and the whole rotten shebang. Sadly he was caught, interrogated, tried, found guilty and was hanged, drawn and quartered.
Nowadays with our sorry mess over politics in general we have a very popular text that is going around, so having given you the backdrop you might understand the gist of this amusing ditty:

 

[Bamaboots]

 

[Frunobulax]

Ummm...

 

[Frunobulax]

 

[Trenchfriend]

Are you an enemy of alcohol?

Sure, we are all. That's why it's to be "eliminated".

 

[drmaxtejeda]

In 1605 we had a fellow, name of Guido Fawkes, or Guy Fawkes, one of nine conspirators, who attempted to blow up The King, Parliament and the whole rotten shebang. Sadly he was caught, interrogated, tried, found guilty and was hanged, drawn and quartered.
Nowadays with our sorry mess over politics in general we have a very popular text that is going around, so having given you the backdrop you might understand the gist of this amusing ditty:
View attachment 192476

Yes, I have read about Guy Fawkes before. I once saw a Highlander TV episode where Hugh Fitzcairn is one of the plotters, and so read Guy Fawkes' biography on Wikipedia.

I don't understand the whole "royal family" thing. The way I see it, people enjoy bowing to a bunch of parasites who are shameless enough to feel superior because of it.

I was once told that the Royals work as symbols of the country, when most of them behave like symbols of a house of ill repute.

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[GHT]

My wife had an accident in my classic car

Is she injured?

Not yet, she's locked herself in the bathroom.

 

[Benny Holiday]

Tax Office/IRS motto: "We've got what it takes to take what you've got."

 

[Bamaboots]

 

[Benny Holiday]

Some people are like slinkies. They're not really good for anything, but you can't help but smile when they fall down the stairs.

 

[Trenchfriend]

Some people are like slinkies. They're not really good for anything, but you can't help but smile when they fall down the stairs.

Ah, "slinkies"! I got you.

 

[Benny Holiday]

The Miss Universe pageant is fixed. All the winners are from Earth.

AND . . . Does anyone else think it's ironic that only one company makes the board game Monopoly?

 

[Bamaboots]

 

[GHT]

 

[drmaxtejeda]

"What the hell was that?"

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[Trenchfriend]

Chilling chilean Chinchilla-chicas...

 

[drmaxtejeda]

At some point, priorities change.

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[3fingers]

^^^ I'm not sure about that. When I was about 10 or 12 years old one of the neighbor kids swiped a Playboy magazine from dad or older brother. 3 or 4 of us were behind a garage learning about life's mysteries when an old neighbor caught us and took the opportunity to tell us how wrong and sinful such things were. I noticed while he lectured and clicked his tongue he had to carefully examine every page to be sure he had all of the information.

 

[drmaxtejeda]

^^^ I'm not sure about that. When I was about 10 or 12 years old one of the neighbor kids swiped a Playboy magazine from dad or older brother. 3 or 4 of us were behind a garage learning about life's mysteries when an old neighbor caught us and took the opportunity to tell us how wrong and sinful such things were. I noticed while he lectured and clicked his tongue he had to carefully examine every page to be sure he had all of the information.

Turns out the woman in the painting was reading an erotic novel, too. [emoji1]

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[Frunobulax]

Car humor...