Appropriate Dress to Wear As Wedding Guest. Black? Red?

[BegintheBeguine]

I knew I'd seen this somewhere. Caveats: it's American, it's current, and there's black, red and even ivory galore. However, you may get some ideas by clicking on each venue under What to Wear to a Wedding. http://www.newport-news.com/shop/category_splash.aspx?gp_coll_id=9&gp_cat_id=1649&gp_fashcoll_id=10
The floral dress under the Garden Wedding category and its accessories look kinda cute.
I haven't had any luck asking older ladies what gals wore to weddings in the Golden Era. My mom and my sister's mother-in-law couldn't give any examples.

 

[Lola Valentine]

Everyone has pretty much said what I was thinking, thank God I have somewhere to come & double check these things!

 

[Helen Troy]

No black, white/cream or red!

Someone once told my mother, when I was getting married, that she was the only one allowed to wear red. If i remember correctly. It was supposed to be a colour that only the mother-in-law could wear.

Has anyone got Emily Post around? I'm sure she has written everything we need to know about this!

fftopic: I do really not think that all this colour-stuff is important in our modern times, although not wearing white is a nice symbolic gesture to the bride. I also don't care about dress lengths etc, the only important thing is to dress nice, you really need to dress up a bit to honor the occasion. The only time I have seen someone not dressed in a way I found offensive, was a couple that showed up in mutual friends wedding wearing combat boots and old t-shirts, coming straight from a hike. I thought that was a bit rude!

 

[Miss Sis]

Even at a modern wedding, I would not wear black or red as solid colours. Maybe a print with those colours in as long as it isn't screaming 'Look at me'.

I agree that these days you are lucky if people don't turn up wearing jeans or some other such inappropriate attire.

To me, being invited to a traditional style wedding means dressing up as a mark of respect for the bride and groom. If it is on a beach or somewhere different you make adjustments to your outfit but still make the effort. I just can't stand scruffy because people can't be bothered.

 

[Fleur De Guerre]

Oh I don't know. This weekend I went to a wedding of a very stylish friend of mine, which was held in a registry office, albeit a very old, ornate country house - Oldway Mansion - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oldway_Mansion

So though it wasn't a church wedding, you could say the location was very smart. But her bridesmaids were all in red-trimmed black dresses, and their friends all wore different kinds of outfits, no blue denim, but some smart, new looking black jeans, some black or red dresses and even some smart trainers (nothing scuffed or old). The mother of the bride wore a zebra print dress, which was another theme (the bride wore white with black straps and belt, and zebra trimmed shoes, the groom and men wore zebra ties with their black suits...if that sounds tacky, it wasn't! It was tastefully done!). Everyone was at their stylish best, and even the older relatives commented on how great everyone looked.

I'll add that no one was informed of a dress/colour code, it's just that we knew our friends and dressed accordingly.

 

[princessofcandl]

The mother of the bride wore a zebra print dress, which was another theme (the bride wore white with black straps and belt, and zebra trimmed shoes, the groom and men wore zebra ties with their black suits.

Ohhhhh... that sounds fun. And a very chic way to jazz up traditioin.

 

[ThesFlishThngs]

Wedding Attire Dilemna

I've browsed around the lounge enough to know the dames here are full of clever fashion ideas. Allow me to pick your brains please. I'm flying to England next month to attend a wedding; a very "vintage fantasy" wedding of a dear friend. Dress code on the invite: Wildly Extravagant.
Recently I've learned another guest (with whom I'll be sharing a hotel room for a night), will be dressing a la Theda Bara in her most vampish mood. With info like this, suddenly I'm at a complete loss!
The last thing I want is to glean a lot of gorgeous vintage accessory treasures, only to have my case go missing, or get rifled through by a sticky-fingered security character.
Someone has already offered the solution of just wearing it all on the flight....

Anyway, if you were in this situation, how do you think you'd dress?

 

[magneto]

Hi there! No great wisdom to impart from me ...If it were me, I'd find out if the wedding is focussing on a certain era (Theda Bara == 1910s/early 20s perhaps?) and use that as guideline. That would narrow your search down a lot. Is a day or evening wedding ("wildly extravagant" makes me think evening and would be suitable for more swank attire)? I have always been partial to late 1910s day dresses myself. And the slinky pleated Fortuny-dress look (there must be knock-offs available somewhere).

If there is no suggested era for the guests' attire, I'd guess I'd pick my favorite era, look at period clothes catalogues/magazines/books (such as that "Illustrated Fashions of the 19X0's" series) find an outfit you like and go from there.

And of course, DO NOT check any baggage containing your vintage outfit but carry it on board...since anything one wears in travelling becomes crushed, torn, covered in baby-spew from your charming infant seatmate, etc...so I would not wear it, personally

 

[$ally]

That is good advice.
I am no expert here, either. I would suggest finding out as much as possible about the flowers and bridesmaids gowns. That may give you more to go on. My general rule is to be same style, less dressy, not the same color, not a clashing color.

 

[ohairas]

Hmm, wearing it on the plane is a great idea. Either that or mail it to someone there and then pick it up.
Nikki

 

[Paisley]

I'd rent a costume when I got there.

 

[ThesFlishThngs]

It would be fun to make a vintage spectacle of myself, wouldn't it, being the only person on the flight not wearing sweats and a t-shirt.....
The wedding theme is very eclectic; the bride has visited me twice, the last time this spring, during which she frantically searched for 'just the right wedding gown.' She settled on a tattered, dingy-with-age, tulle affair, that looks as if it were worn by a fallen faerie. While that one was being mended, she has since found a 1930's style Monsoon gown, and can't decide which she'll wear now, so you can see, it truly is an anything goes affair.

Thanks for reinforcing my thoughts that I need to carry or wear anything precious to me.

 

[texasgirl]

I'd do something 20s if it were me. I'd wear something sparkily and fun! Here are a couple examples- I'd really have fun with it- I mean how often do we get to dress "Wildly Extravagant???"

I'd definitely do carry-on. The plane trip is too long to wear something fancy.

And maybe something feathery in your hair

 

[ThesFlishThngs]

http://www.flickr.com/photos/7133299@N07/407380530/in/set-72157594560704974/


I am considering 20's, seeing as I have this fabu dress that's only been worn once. (Hope the link works....)

 

[Ada Veen]

You could hire a full costume from a theatre when you get to England, depending where the wedding is. Big theatres often hire costumes from old plays and they are fantastic, really good quality, nice fabrics and not at all pantomine-y. I hired a medieval one from York Theatre Royal once... they have so many choices, all decades, all the accessories included. Of course, it only works if the wedding is near a big town with a good theatre!

 

[zaika]

Wedding attire when you don't have much...

Ladies! I have another question for you! I hope you answer.

The daughter of some very old family friends is getting married this weekend…and I only found out about it a few days ago. I am racking my brain trying to think of what I could possibly wear. I have, coming in the mail, a black brocade Chinese dress that I bought online. Would this be suitable for a wedding? I’d love to go all out and try to find a vintage dress, but I don’t have time or the funds at the moment. Do you think black could be forgivable if I looked good? Most of my clothes are black anyway…I just…bleh. I dunno what to do, really.

I loathe weddings in general, so I don’t really keep anything with those sorts of events in mind when I shop (although this will change in the future because what better place to get gussied up in vintage than at a wedding?? I’m SO shallow…).

Any kind of suggestions would be really helpful.

 

[KittyT]

Try using the search function. There is at least one thread on wedding attire that covers things like appropriate attire and colors.

 

[Paisley]

Do you have a non-black suit? You could wear that. If all your suits are black, you could wear just the pants or skirt and a nice non-black top.

 

[texasgirl]

I see nothing wrong with a black dress. Especially if it's an evening wedding. I think it's more important to wear something nice and something you feel comfortable in. Then you will walk with confidence and feel pretty! I personally would not wear pants, I think a wedding is something special, not something that could be considered a work outfit for example. Maybe throw in a red shawl or some other color to put some color into it.

 

[KittyT]

Black is supposedly acceptable, especially for an evening wedding. I, however, am a bit more traditional when it comes to wedding attire and my personal opinion is that all black is inappropriate, unless it's a men's suit!