Want to buy or sell something? Check the classifieds
  • The Fedora Lounge is supported in part by commission earning affiliate links sitewide. Please support us by using them. You may learn more here.

All You Need to Know About Hat Etiquette

Ryan94

New in Town
Messages
2
Location
Germany
Hi and thanks for your kind welcome! :)

So, if you put it in a right way, there's nothing totally wrong with putting a hat with a jacket on. That's what I wanna to hear, so I will do it in the future but also try to be polite as possible to my boss' wife.

And the story, that she doens't like me is a long story and I can't recall when or WHY it began to be so problematic between us. The funny part of it is, that I absolutely like my boss, he's good to his employees and he knows what he is doing at work.

So, thank you again and I will surely write and read here in the future to learn more about our all favourites. ;)

Best regards
 

suitedcboy

One Too Many
Messages
1,348
Location
Fort Worth Texas or thereabouts
Ryan,
A question for you.
Do you see men in your area wearing fedoras?

It would seem that even if hat wearing is rare you would still be attracting some attention to yourself and your clothing. The attention should lead to questions and those questions would lead to referrals to the men's shop where you are employed.
Have you spoken to your boss about this issue with his wife?

Good luck with this problem and by all means keep up your dashing appearance by wearing your hat!
 

Torpedo

One Too Many
Messages
1,332
Location
Barcelona (Spain)
Hi Ryan,

When I go to work, I enter the buiding with my hat on, and conserve it until I exit the elevator (which is next to the collective office I work in), or when actually entering the office. This I modify if any lady enters the elevator too, then I remove my hat.

When I leave, I usually put my hat again when I go down with the same elevator.

One think I have experienced is that you have to educate/explain other people the nuances of hat etiquette, because this is largely unknown, for instance about the question of keeping hats indoors when in public places. I have found that when you show you are realy familiarized with the rules, by explaining them, they understand.

Of course this may well fail with your boss' wife... [huh]

Regards!
 

Ordinary Guy

One Too Many
Messages
1,292
Location
Pittsburgh, PA
There is a great thread on hat Etiquette, I forget where , maybe in the stickies somewhere but it was neat and I made several notes from it.....

Whoops sorry, it is right there on the main page, it is worth the time to read through the whole thing IMHO
 

rrog

A-List Customer
Messages
430
Location
East Tennessee
Hap said:
Thanks for the information everyone - I was the only gent there with a hat on, so I was on my own.


That's part of the problem. I was always taught that when you're in a situation where you are unsure of proper etiquette, do what everyone else is doing. Well, hardly anyone else is wearing nice hats these days!

rrog
 
Messages
10,524
Location
DnD Ranch, Cherokee County, GA
My grandfather taught me to take my hat off in the house = court House (actually in a court room), church (God's house) & a person's house. Office buildings & restuarants are not "houses". I've also heard you can keep your hat on if eating at a counter but take it off while sitting at a table. I have shown horses all over & most western hat wearers will leave their lids on while eating even seated at a table mainly due to how their hair would look if they uncover = wearing hats all day at the arena does make an unpleasant hair style. Wearing one all day in the barn & in the saddle does the same... gtd
 

Wolfmanjack

Practically Family
Messages
547
I posted this reply to a thread nearly two years ago. At the risk of repeating myself, I'll tell the story again:

As a Professor in a small liberal arts college, I take very seriously my responsibility to help my students develop the skills to be successful. One of these skills is to not just know etiquette, but to be at ease with it. Confidence and poise requires practice, and thus I insist that they practice etiquette in my presence. My male students know they must always remove their hats upon entering my classrooms and laboratories.

Later in their life, they may choose to defy social custom in certain situations. But it is knowledge and practice that gives them that choice; they may flaunt the rules, or follow them with aplomb.

You can imagine the ‘shock and awe’ that occurs when I announce this on the first day of classes. There are gasps, jaws drop, glances are exchanged and eyes roll. Some contemplate rebellion, but they soon learn that they have no choice in the matter. And yes, well before the first examination they are all doffing their hats at my door, without a thought or care.

Last week my wife and I entered a local pizza parlor and were led to a booth. Across the room, in a booth on the opposite wall, was one of my students and several of his friends…all wearing ball caps. Our eyes met, and as if by reflex, he snatched his hat from his head. Whispers were exchanged…and soon all the hats were off!

You can imagine my satisfaction.
 

quintox

New in Town
Messages
21
Location
orange county,ca
Probaly i should have added that yes, one must be comfortable with oneself in their decisions- of knowing when to remove and when not to.

quin


....... Audaces fortunat juvat timidos que repellit .......
" Fortune favors the bold and scorns the timid "
 

MisterGrey

Practically Family
Messages
526
Location
Texas, USA
suitedcboy said:
Some of the hat etiquette differences in application stem from the origin of the rule of etiquette: to wear a hat and coat in someone's residence was to suggest that you came in ready to leave becuase they were not worthy of a visit. Hats worn for lengthy periods and as part of a uniform violated this rule even in earlier times.
I am a western hat wearer for the majority of my day and to remove it is to show a head of hair (whats left of it) in a most unattractive shape and is in my opinion more rude that to leave it on.
I tip my hat to ladies and I make a choice of hat removal in a restaurant or in someone's home based on observation or past experience.
A great number of people I know, and have known for a long time, will see me remove my hat and instruct me to put it back as I am not the "same person without a hat on".

I observe a different standardfor a fedora worn with dressy casual or business clothes. Fedoras are more typically worn as an accessory while outdoors as a protective device and not part of a uniform per se. Fedora off indoors almost 100%

If neither of these is a convincing enough argument then I will tell you that my 100X or 500x felt westerns cost a LOT more than any of my fedoras and ain't nobody gonna sit on one of 'em!!! so they will stay on my head more of the time.


I've noticed this myself in the areas around Houston: Gentlemen wearing "dress" hats (they tend to be panama variations) will remove them indoors, but I don't think I have ever seen a man carting around his Stetson or Resistol-- those always remain planted firmly on the noggin.

Here's something I've wondered-- and yes, I realize how nitpicky I'm getting, and no, I don't care-- what are the "rules" in regards to grocery stores and department stores? I tend to take a basket at Wal-Mart or Kroger's, even if I'm not getting terribly much, just so I'll have someplace to stick my hat, and if I want to look at the back of a book or CD at Barnes and Nobel, I quickly become a living demonstration of a balancing act. Am I showing proper manners, or have I been going to too much effort?
 
Messages
11,579
Location
Covina, Califonia 91722
Some public places you are to be respectful and remove your hat when entering, I'd list house of worship, school, government building, library, hospital. However when shopping, many will say it is not a necesity especially of you're going to be handling items and negotiating a crowded store.
 

dnjan

One Too Many
Messages
1,690
Location
Seattle
Ryan94 said:
Hello,
I was putting on my jacket and hat and just wanted to go downstairs to leave the building I am working in, and just in this moment she showed up and told me, that I never EVER should put on my hat before I left a building.
Personally, I think that it would be preferable, especially as an employee, to put on the jacket but carry the hat in hand until you get to the door. Then put your hat on to free up the hand to open the door.
I think that this would look especially "proper" to any customers in the business as you are preparing to leave.
 

ScionPI2005

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,335
Location
Seattle, Washington
MisterGrey said:
Here's something I've wondered-- and yes, I realize how nitpicky I'm getting, and no, I don't care-- what are the "rules" in regards to grocery stores and department stores? I tend to take a basket at Wal-Mart or Kroger's, even if I'm not getting terribly much, just so I'll have someplace to stick my hat, and if I want to look at the back of a book or CD at Barnes and Nobel, I quickly become a living demonstration of a balancing act. Am I showing proper manners, or have I been going to too much effort?

In my opinion, I really don't think that's necessary at all. Places such as grocery stores, or malls are very public places and I really don't see the need to take your hat off in a situation like that.

I draw the line when the situation becomes more "intimate" or personal. A school, a work place, a person's home, or sitting down to eat with someone or a group of people. Even being in a hospital or a church is much more personal. I really think places and situations like that make all the difference.
 

Unlucky Berman

One of the Regulars
Messages
180
Location
Germany
Not sure if it was answered, how is it when you are travelling. For example if you enter a train station, that's public area, so let it on. But how is it in that moments, when you buy your ticket? Normally the people who sells me the ticket are women, so I am not sure, if it is rude to let the hat on my head. On the other side, if I take it off, I can't hold it in my hand, because I need both hands to pay and I don't want to lay it onto the counter. And how about entering the train, is this still public area until you arrive your seat (where I normally take it off, because it's a bit in the way sitting their with these head cushions)?
 

MattJH

One Too Many
Messages
1,388
Unlucky Berman said:
Not sure if it was answered, how is it when you are travelling. For example if you enter a train station, that's public area, so let it on. But how is it in that moments, when you buy your ticket? Normally the people who sells me the ticket are women, so I am not sure, if it is rude to let the hat on my head. On the other side, if I take it off, I can't hold it in my hand, because I need both hands to pay and I don't want to lay it onto the counter. And how about entering the train, is this still public area until you arrive your seat (where I normally take it off, because it's a bit in the way sitting their with these head cushions)?

Amazing. It's like having a second job.
 

avedwards

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,425
Location
London and Midlands, UK
Unlucky Berman said:
Not sure if it was answered, how is it when you are travelling. For example if you enter a train station, that's public area, so let it on. But how is it in that moments, when you buy your ticket? Normally the people who sells me the ticket are women, so I am not sure, if it is rude to let the hat on my head. On the other side, if I take it off, I can't hold it in my hand, because I need both hands to pay and I don't want to lay it onto the counter. And how about entering the train, is this still public area until you arrive your seat (where I normally take it off, because it's a bit in the way sitting their with these head cushions)?

I would keep the hat on while buying the ticket but possibly tip it. On the train, definitely take it off.
 

Pduck

One of the Regulars
Messages
136
Location
Wisconsin
Here's a question about hat etiquette I've never seen answered. It's proper for a man to keep his hat on in a building's lobby or in corridors. What about a church's lobby (e.g. the narthex)? Right now, I always take my hat off when I first walk in the door and leave it off until I go back outside. Would it be considered a faux pas to have a hat on in the narthex of a church after service while visiting with friends and the preacher?
 

Wolfmanjack

Practically Family
Messages
547
Unlucky Berman said:
Not sure if it was answered, how is it when you are travelling. For example if you enter a train station, that's public area, so let it on. But how is it in that moments, when you buy your ticket? Normally the people who sells me the ticket are women, so I am not sure, if it is rude to let the hat on my head. On the other side, if I take it off, I can't hold it in my hand, because I need both hands to pay and I don't want to lay it onto the counter. And how about entering the train, is this still public area until you arrive your seat (where I normally take it off, because it's a bit in the way sitting their with these head cushions)?

You should leave your hat on when transacting business across a service counter in a public place, e.g., department store, train station, grocery, etc. If the person serving you is a lady, a courtly gentleman will tip his hat (merely touch the brim) when initiating the transaction and again at its completion.

I find that most ladies are absolutely charmed by these gestures and it invariably elicits a sweet smile from them. For me, that is all the reason I need to do it always.
 

Staff online

Forum statistics

Threads
109,260
Messages
3,077,483
Members
54,183
Latest member
UrbanGraveDave
Top