All You Need to Know About Hat Etiquette

[deadlyhandsome]

I went to Birdland in NYC last week to hear Lucky Peterson. Great show, and a great time.

The Birdland Jazz club looks exactly like all those small dinner clubs you see in movies from the 1940s and 50s - small tables for two with a candle, and everyone right up close to the stage. The bar is in the back.

Now I am old school, and if I am seated at a bar or lunch counter, (or shooting pool) I keep my hat on.



If I'm at a table, it's hats off, and I did so here. But what surprised me is a number of men (I counted five) who kept their hats on while seated at tables. Are they ignorant of the rules of etiquette, or don't they care, or have things changed?

View attachment 144854

Many times, in restaurants, I've seen guys at tables with their hats on. I have wanted to politely approach them and remind them that "a gentleman doffs his hat when seated at a table." But the possibility of an "off-the-menu" knuckle sandwich has so far deterred me.

I usually leave my hat in my car because so few places have safe areas to leave it. I’m not keeping it on my lap or on the table and you can’t depend on an empty chair. If I don’t have my car handy it sometimes remains on my head just because there isn’t a good alternative. The places I frequent don’t offer hat/coat check.

All etiquette is contrived and constantly changing, and quite often very arbitrary. The style leaders of the past were the rule breakers of their day.

I’d also say that the person “reminding” others of etiquette is being less polite and more boorish than the hatted offender; I’m glad you resisted the urge to confront them.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Pro

 

[AbbaDatDeHat]

I went to Birdland in NYC last week to hear Lucky Peterson. Great show, and a great time.

The Birdland Jazz club looks exactly like all those small dinner clubs you see in movies from the 1940s and 50s - small tables for two with a candle, and everyone right up close to the stage. The bar is in the back.

Now I am old school, and if I am seated at a bar or lunch counter, (or shooting pool) I keep my hat on.



If I'm at a table, it's hats off, and I did so here. But what surprised me is a number of men (I counted five) who kept their hats on while seated at tables. Are they ignorant of the rules of etiquette, or don't they care, or have things changed?

View attachment 144854

Many times, in restaurants, I've seen guys at tables with their hats on. I have wanted to politely approach them and remind them that "a gentleman doffs his hat when seated at a table." But the possibility of an "off-the-menu" knuckle sandwich has so far deterred me.

Lol...
If an “off-the-menu” knuckle sandwich was all it took to deter your gentleman position....i’d say you weren’t really committed to the position and only had an opinion...just like those FIVE other hatted guys.
Just a thought....

 

[Firefighter31]

Nice pic! I just returned from my local eatery. Kind of a fast food place with booths and tables. Since I ate alone I left my hat on my head. I have noticed many people wearing their ball caps in this place so I figure what works for them should work for me, I guess. LOL

 

[GHT]

Failure to Doff Hat Lands Man in Jail

When law enforcement graduate Pete Eyre entered a Keene, New Hampshire courtroom last Monday, he didn't expect to be snatched from his chair and placed in a cage. But that's what happened. His crime? He wore a hat.

"When a gesture of respect is made mandatory, it becomes an act of submission. I believe all men and women are created equal. No one may be forced to submit to another. That's just not right," said Eyre, after being released from jail on Thursday.

Eyre is charged with resisting arrest and disorderly conduct by Keene police officer James Cemorelis under docket number 11-CR-311. But video of the incident, available on YouTube, shows Eyre sitting quietly in the unused courtroom. It also shows that while Eyre did not actively cooperate with Cemorelis and fellow officer Matt Griffin, he also did not actively resist.

"Wear a hat in court, get taken to the ground, a knee to the head, and dragged away. Welcome to the land of the free!" said spectator Ian Freeman, who witnessed the arrest.

In his complaint, Cemorelis accused Eyre of creating "a risk of causing a breach of the peace or public inconvenience" when he "refused to remove his hat or leave the Keene District Court when requested to do so by a bailiff."

"Moments after the arrest, a police officer walked into the court wearing a hat, and none of the bailiffs said anything about it," added eyewitness Mike Segal.

https://www.prnewswire.com/news-releases/failure-to-doff-hat-lands-man-in-jail-114920304.html

 

[hatsRme]

And why is this a new thread again?!
The topic is age old, well-covered in several past convos, if you search.

 

[GHT]

And why is this a new thread again?!
The topic is age old, well-covered in several past convos, if you search.

To answer that is risking heresy. You see, the search function on the lounge sucks, it's much easier and you get exact and instant results if you Google, "Fedora Lounge, Hats Off." That's how I discovered the: "Happy Birthday" thread.

 

[hatsRme]

To answer that is risking heresy. You see, the search function on the lounge sucks, it's much easier and you get exact and instant results if you Google, "Fedora Lounge, Hats Off." That's how I discovered the: "Happy Birthday" thread.

True. Apologies for not considering that! The best way to search any topic on the Lounge is to go to Google, cite the topic, and then add “fedora lounge.”
Asking”Hats in restaurants fedora lounge” pulled up this

 

[belfastboy]

True. Apologies for not considering that! The best way to search any topic on the Lounge is to go to Google, cite the topic, and then add “fedora lounge.”
Asking”Hats in restaurants fedora lounge” pulled up this

It took me quite a while as a newbie to catch on to using the Google search for best results.

 

[deadlyhandsome]

Failure to Doff Hat Lands Man in Jail

When law enforcement graduate Pete Eyre entered a Keene, New Hampshire courtroom last Monday, he didn't expect to be snatched from his chair and placed in a cage. But that's what happened. His crime? He wore a hat.

"When a gesture of respect is made mandatory, it becomes an act of submission. I believe all men and women are created equal. No one may be forced to submit to another. That's just not right," said Eyre, after being released from jail on Thursday.

Eyre is charged with resisting arrest and disorderly conduct by Keene police officer James Cemorelis under docket number 11-CR-311. But video of the incident, available on YouTube, shows Eyre sitting quietly in the unused courtroom. It also shows that while Eyre did not actively cooperate with Cemorelis and fellow officer Matt Griffin, he also did not actively resist.

"Wear a hat in court, get taken to the ground, a knee to the head, and dragged away. Welcome to the land of the free!" said spectator Ian Freeman, who witnessed the arrest.

In his complaint, Cemorelis accused Eyre of creating "a risk of causing a breach of the peace or public inconvenience" when he "refused to remove his hat or leave the Keene District Court when requested to do so by a bailiff."

"Moments after the arrest, a police officer walked into the court wearing a hat, and none of the bailiffs said anything about it," added eyewitness Mike Segal.

https://www.prnewswire.com/news-releases/failure-to-doff-hat-lands-man-in-jail-114920304.html

If the hat genuinely causes a problem (e.g., it blocks your view at the theater) than “we” have the right to ask the offender to remove it. If all the hat wearing does is offend one’s sensibilities or strikes a discordant chord with your personal/societal rules of etiquette then I think you leave the wearer alone. The philosophy of your rights ending where another’s begins make sense here. Rules of etiquette are not laws and I believe the individual has the right to their freedoms without rude criticisms. The bar to infringe upon those freedoms should be quite high; higher than just offending your eye.

I like when men hold doors open for women, when men don’t wear dinner suits in the morning, when men doff their hats when entering an intimate environment, when men don’t wear socks with sandals...or sandals at all, and when men’s socks match their trousers rather than their shoes. I’d never dream of pointing out such arbitrary violations of contrived etiquette.

I also like to intentionally break the rules at times...I’ve even worn brown shoes and tweed in the city! No torches and pitchforks I beg you!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Pro

 

[GHT]

I like when men hold doors open for women, when men don’t wear dinner suits in the morning, when men doff their hats when entering an intimate environment, when men don’t wear socks with sandals...or sandals at all, and when men’s socks match their trousers rather than their shoes. I’d never dream of pointing out such arbitrary violations of contrived etiquette.

Some years ago I saw a lady, burdened down with shopping bags, trying to open an access door. "Allow me," I said with a smile, as I held the door open. Dear, oh dear, she ripped into me. "I'm not incapable just because I'm female," she retorted. We locked eyes for what seemed like an age but was no more than a second or two, I then replied: "When I was a small boy my mother told me that many people would enter my life, I had but a split second to make an impression." We continued the eye lock for a few more seconds until she finally said: "Wise woman, you're mother." And with that she was gone, no thank you or much appreciated.

I also like to intentionally break the rules at times...I’ve even worn brown shoes and tweed in the city! No torches and pitchforks I beg you!

Brown shoes and tweed? Seriously?

 

[deadlyhandsome]

Some years ago I saw a lady, burdened down with shopping bags, trying to open an access door. "Allow me," I said with a smile, as I held the door open. Dear, oh dear, she ripped into me. "I'm not incapable just because I'm female," she retorted. We locked eyes for what seemed like an age but was no more than a second or two, I then replied: "When I was a small boy my mother told me that many people would enter my life, I had but a split second to make an impression." We continued the eye lock for a few more seconds until she finally said: "Wise woman, you're mother." And with that she was gone, no thank you or much appreciated.


Brown shoes and tweed? Seriously?
View attachment 145028

I know! The shame still haunts me.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Pro

 

[DanO]

I catch this discussion on occasion, and am always amused. I started wearing and collecting hats after my retirement, I wear them solely for my enjoyment. I sometimes will remove my hat in an establishment but only if there is a safe place to place it. The demise of hat check or even hooks has changed the etiquette of hat wearing. I will always remove my hat when entering a church (mind you I only enter churches for funerals). Don't even get me started on ball caps
(worn backwards or ??), do the "rules" even apply to "caps"?

 

[deadlyhandsome]

I catch this discussion on occasion, and am always amused. I started wearing and collecting hats after my retirement, I wear them solely for my enjoyment. I sometimes will remove my hat in an establishment but only if there is a safe place to place it. The demise of hat check or even hooks has changed the etiquette of hat wearing. I will always remove my hat when entering a church (mind you I only enter churches for funerals). Don't even get me started on ball caps
(worn backwards or ??), do the "rules" even apply to "caps"?

I agree that the rules of etiquette have changed as the infrastructure no longer exists to accommodate hat wearers. If there isn’t a safe and secure place for it then on my head it stays.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Pro

 

[AbbaDatDeHat]

^^^^ditto to that!
And to those who say otherwise
i say .....mind your own hat!!!
B

 

[suitedcboy]

In true ranching-heavy parts of TX, and other states too, you will see men in restaurants with white as snow foreheads and scalps and their skin fades to leathery texture as you get to the necks and top of chest as it appears in the part of the shirt. Their hair has the obvious smash from wearing a hat all day until just a few minutes before. If seeing their ashen white small bit of skin and their hat ring in their hair is supposed to be respectful to anyone then I obviously don't understand respect. If you put on a hat in the last instant before going outside and are outside briefly and preserving your 'do is your goal then go for it. Take it off ASAP and keep that good hairdo. If you've worn that hat for hours and sweated in it then please respect me by NOT taking that hat off. I don't want to see your bleached ass when you take down your pants either.
Besides, this is a place for hat lovers, I want to look at your hat and guess what it might be and see the crease and see what associations I make of the crease. Maybe it has a band I might think is way cool or a self band with something out of the ordinary for a buckle set. I'm 60 years old so this is not some young whipper-snapper talking. If you knew me personally or asked anyone that knows me they would say I'm kind and respectful and very considerate of others. Most also will tell me to put my hat back on if I take off as I don't look right without it on my head (I think they are really telling me I have an ugly noggin).

 

[Frunobulax]

The House of Representatives has lifted a 181-year-old ban against wearing hats on the floor of the House. The ban was instituted in 1837 as to push back against the British custom of wearing hats in parliament.

Buy your congresscritter a Fedora!

Sent directly from my mind to yours.

 

[belfastboy]

In true ranching-heavy parts of TX, and other states too, you will see men in restaurants with white as snow foreheads and scalps and their skin fades to leathery texture as you get to the necks and top of chest as it appears in the part of the shirt. Their hair has the obvious smash from wearing a hat all day until just a few minutes before. If seeing their ashen white small bit of skin and their hat ring in their hair is supposed to be respectful to anyone then I obviously don't understand respect. If you put on a hat in the last instant before going outside and are outside briefly and preserving your 'do is your goal then go for it. Take it off ASAP and keep that good hairdo. If you've worn that hat for hours and sweated in it then please respect me by NOT taking that hat off. I don't want to see your bleached ass when you take down your pants either.
Besides, this is a place for hat lovers, I want to look at your hat and guess what it might be and see the crease and see what associations I make of the crease. Maybe it has a band I might think is way cool or a self band with something out of the ordinary for a buckle set. I'm 60 years old so this is not some young whipper-snapper talking. If you knew me personally or asked anyone that knows me they would say I'm kind and respectful and very considerate of others. Most also will tell me to put my hat back on if I take off as I don't look right without it on my head (I think they are really telling me I have an ugly noggin).

We are of the same vintage (I a few years older but close enough). I find it interesting watching myself as a fedora wearer. Old messages implanted are hard to shake. I am not one much for decorum and do not care who wears the hat, when or where But I am not comfortable wearing a hat in certain circumstances, in restaurants in company of my wife, in a church sanctuary, or an office. It has nothing to do with decorum directly but it is that damn mother's voice in my head admonishing me to "take the damn hat off!"

 

[Woodtroll]

The House of Representatives has lifted a 181-year-old ban against wearing hats on the floor of the House. The ban was instituted in 1837 as to push back against the British custom of wearing hats in parliament.

Buy your congresscritter a Fedora!

But unfortunately, it had less to do with hats (as such) and more to do with the non-hat headwear of some recently elected Representatives.

 

[777crew]

I think hats went "out" with JFK.. That said, my goal has always been to bring them back... But, looking at today's "progressives/millenials", that may be an uphill battle.. Unless by "hat" you mean "manbun"... Oh, just shoot me!!

Sent from my HTC U11 life using Tapatalk

 

[deadlyhandsome]

I think hats went "out" with JFK.. That said, my goal has always been to bring them back... But, looking at today's "progressives/millenials", that may be an uphill battle.. Unless by "hat" you mean "manbun"... Oh, just shoot me!!

Sent from my HTC U11 life using Tapatalk

JFK gets a lot of blame he doesn’t deserve. Hat wearing was in free fall decline before he climbed to prominence. And despite urban legend, President Kennedy did wear a top hat for his inauguration.

I think hat wearing will ebb and flow, but I don’t ever see it getting back to where it was. The world as moved on.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Pro