Bob Roberts
I'll Lock Up
- Messages
- 11,201
- Location
- milford ct
Lol. I am. Cheers!
Ps. I don't bring animals to the dinner table. Poor manners.
Ps. I don't bring animals to the dinner table. Poor manners.
I do, but only when parts of them have been properly cooked....Ps. I don't bring animals to the dinner table. Poor manners.
I that how i understand hat etiquette, public space hat on, elevator hat on unless there's a lady, personal spaces hat of as restaurants as well.Well, according to the traditional rules of hat wearing, even that is not the case. Common areas of public buildings (lobbies, hallways): hat on. Non-public, more personal areas: hat off. Elevators: hat on, unless a lady enters (and it's not too crowded. On the street: hat on, unless you stop to speak with a lady who is not your wife, then hat off. Restaurants: hat off, unless dining al fresco or at a counter, then hat on. Of course, this was when a restaurant provided a place to put your hat, which is no longer the case.
As you can see, there were somewhat elaborate and esoteric rituals associated with how a "gentleman" handled his headware when hats were more common. That's all well and good, but the modern world does not make this easy. Many places, such as restaurants, offices, etc. no longer have a place to put your hat, making adaptation necessary. Therefore, newer and flexible rules need to be applied. We need to adapt with the times.
Sent directly from my mind to yours.
So if I am at your home and my head is cold would you still be offended if I kept my hat on?If you come into my house and stand there for more than a minute, I'll ask you if your head is cold.
Way back in the mists of time, in a tabloid newspaper called The Daily Mirror, was a comic strip called Andy Capp. He was a cloth cap wearing, idle layabout.real men bathe whilst wearing a hat.
So if I am at your home and my head is cold would you still be offended if I kept my hat on?
Thanks! I appreciate your understanding and hospitalityWhen you stop drinking formaldehyde and your head clears, we can discuss it.
I like Steve.
+1 Hear Hear! A well spoken evaluation of hat etiquette in today's world. I agree totally.While pensively perusing pages of hatter Leon Wexler (Real name, Steve Temkin) from Toronto, I discovered Steve has added a blog of general hat talk. Of course, there's a section on etiquette he's written, and I think Steve's thought's are well worth sharing here.
From the Leon Wexler Hats website...
(HAT) Functionality and Etiquette
"Why wear a fine beaver felt hat? I can think of six reasons: sun, rain, sleet, snow, cold, and last but not necessarily the least, wanting to look good while addressing the first five. As mentioned before, a hat is outerwear. When its intention ceases to appear at least modestly functional, it risks devolving into a conspicuous fashion doodad or identity costume.
That’s why when you settle somewhere indoors such as a restaurant, the theatre or someone’s home, it’s not only a traditional courtesy but also a good idea to remove your hat. Not doing so risks making you look buffoonish because the hat becomes non-functional and more easily regarded as a vain ornament.
Now, despite the above observations, removing one’s hat indoors is viewed primarily as a “rule” of etiquette. No doubt, the concept of etiquette is more controversial in the modern world than it once was. For some, the word conjures a wistful nostalgia for a more ordered, genteel time. For others, it represents an oppressive, classist code of artificial behaviours that support a hierarchical social order, and which also suppress individuality and diversity.
And it’s true: at one time, removing one’s hat in certain situations was often an act of deference to a superior. I’m sure most will agree that this has ceased to be valid in a more (theoretically) egalitarian society. However, as a simple gesture of respect for anyone and everyone, it is still relevant as a social courtesy.
Like it or not, failing to remove your hat when socially indoors will be perceived by some as uncouth behaviour. Imagine having someone over for dinner and they kept their overcoat on the whole evening as if they intended to leave at any moment. It would likely make others feel uncomfortable and you none too pleased. It’s the same thing: when indoors socially, we remove our hats as a sign of commonality, respect and social cooperation. (There are many exceptions, like walking through an indoor mall, or temporarily popping into a store, or sitting on a train, or other situations where, similarly, you would likely keep your coat on. Certain religious observances may also have rules of their own.)
Traditionally, this didn’t apply to women because a woman’s hat was regarded as ornamental fashion. Removing it might damage her coiffure—indeed, the hat may be integral to her hairstyle. Obviously, today, such attitudes appear outmoded, even ridiculous, and smack of sexism. That may be, but if you’re a man, I suspect leaving your hat on indoors is probably not an effective way to demonstrate your solidarity with feminist values.
Now, no one would blame you if you thought that such gestures no longer have any meaning in the modern world. And no doubt, the younger you are the more likely it is that you find such things to be, at best, quaint behavioural anachronisms, a part of grandpa’s world.
But we may believe that at our peril. The so-called “old-fashioned rules” of courtesy and etiquette were not arbitrarily snatched out of nowhere, but spawn from innate aspects of social interaction and serve, in part, to make those interactions feel safe and predictable. (One could argue that etiquette evolved from biological imperatives inherent in our instincts for survival.) It also ensures that no one “privatizes” our shared spaces with purely self-serving behaviour at everyone else’s expense.
We may no longer ostracize people for their lack of etiquette, and perhaps that’s a good thing. However, such behaviour still shapes our opinion of them, and them of us, perhaps in ways we don’t even consciously discern.
Besides, where’s the harm? Showing a small gesture of respect for others, even if some find it archaic or arbitrary, is probably something the world could use in greater quantities than what currently seems evident."
I like Steve.
You are a class act my friend!very well said
I personally do not take offense when men do not observe certain rules of "hat etiquette" in my presence ... but I myself observe most of them for reasons he stated
these lines stuck out to me
"... we remove our hats as a sign of commonality, respect and social cooperation."
"where’s the harm? Showing a small gesture of respect for others, even if some find it archaic or arbitrary, is probably something the world could use in greater quantities than what currently seems evident."
frankly ... I sometimes do so even outdoors ... for example if I am meeting someone for the first time who I feel the need to show a particular respect ... i.e., someones mother ...someones wife... a priest ...a military officer etc etc
I can't disagree with a thing in that post, Charlie. Steve seems to have his head on straight.
We may no longer ostracize people for their lack of etiquette, and perhaps that’s a good thing.