Aging

[Foofoogal]

As far as aging I figure at my age that if women can run around with red hats and wear purple I can pretty much wear what I feel comfortable in.
Since I also pretty much have given up finding decent newer clothing(slinky) in most stores that will last the test of time I am adding more and more vintage, not less.
Recently our daughter decided to dye my shorter hair a dark brown that has a lot of red in it. Shocking as I have always had ash brown hair.
Immediately I got compliments and one stating I looked 10 years younger from someone that I never expected to say anything.
So to me sometimes an accident or trying new things is ok.
The hardest thing for me is knowing when something is too young to wear. I am conservative so really meaning inappropriate at any age for me.

 

[kamikat]

The hardest thing for me is knowing when something is too young to wear. I am conservative so really meaning inappropriate at any age for me.

Funny you should say this, I've been trying to decide if jumpers/pinafores are too young for me now. I have several patterns for them, but I'm just not sure if they still work. Are jumpers/pinafores only for the younger ladies?

 

[Lillemor]

The 50s retro styles I wear would've been too young if not down right rediculous on a woman in her 30s at that time but now they probably make me look rediculously dowdy to most people. Until recently I had the problem of feeling much older than I am most of my life and looking much younger. Who knows...in time I might strike a balance between how I feel and how I look.

Having naturally black hair and not naturally suiting other colors I don't know what colors I could go with to appear younger if I should want to look younger some day. I read some where that even the most organic hair dyes contain some coal derivative that has been linked to cancer in all of the darker shades which is not a risk I want to take so I guess the blue-black, plums, berries, and eggplant/aubergine shades I've gone with in the past our out?![huh]

 

[velvetongue]

Lillemor, I recently developed an allergy to a chemical in black hair dye, and have been dyeing my hair (previously had a bright red streak) back to it's natural colour, black. I've been using black henna, which is a blend of red henna and indigo. I went to my local Indian grocery store (to ensure that I was getting ground leaves of the plant, and no other additives) and came out with this green powdery substance that smelled a little bit like spinach. Both are plant-based products, and you mix with water to form a muddy green paste, then smear it on to your hair. That might be a much safer way to dye hair... I haven't been allergic to any of those techniques.

 

[Grant Fan]

The hardest thing for me is knowing when something is too young to wear. I am conservative so really meaning inappropriate at any age for me.

My rule with that is that if you have to question it, then it is probably not age appropreate. It is either too young or too old, and there is such a thing in both directions. I am 23 and while I feel I am still at an age where I can get away with most things there are sum that are no gos. Like leggings, I wore them when I was little and they look cute on little girls, not 20 somethings with figures, its not cute on us.

 

[C-dot]

I read some where that even the most organic hair dyes contain some coal derivative that has been linked to cancer in all of the darker shades which is not a risk I want to take so I guess the blue-black, plums, berries, and eggplant/aubergine shades I've gone with in the past our out?![huh]

The derivatives you speak of are probably in such minute quantities that you'd have to ingest the entire amount of dye every week for a year to get cancer from it. Lighter shades containing bleach have been "linked" to cancer too - so has henna, and the pigments themselves. Hell, walking down the streets these days is linked to cancer.

Black hair, natural or dyed, does tend to age - Putting brown highlights, or even letting a few gray streaks show, can break up the colour and look very distinguished!

 

[Lillemor]

Okay, late in replying because someone else has been hogging the pc. I know several ladies on a long hair forum I'm also a member of use one or another technique with the henna and indigo, either mixed, pre-mixed or as a two step application.

C-dot - Right, and anyone can prove or disapprove anything they want with no or little consequence to them.

Some have success with letting a cup of coffee or even a pot of coffee cool off and then pouring it over their hair. They don't rinse it out, just let it dry and supposedly it doesn't stain once it's dried. They do this about once a week and greys in dark hair are supposed to be less noticeable. I'll let you know if it works for me when I begin to grey.

 

[Foofoogal]

the hair dye I used supposedly doesn't have some sort of chemicals in it. It is a concern of mine so it will be interesting to see if I keep this color. It is very dramatic for me.

 

[Miss 1929]

I too have been under major stress (last week - all in one week I lost my job, my boy friend left me and my dad passed away).
Brooksie

What a horrid time you are having. I am so sorry! And hitting you on three sides like that, how awful.
Here's hoping you weather the storm well.

 

[Lillemor]

Bette Davis said; "Old age is no place for sissies."

"I think your whole life shows in your face and you should be proud of that."
Lauren Bacall

Be proud that you have gotten this far in life. Some people never do.

This is very true and something I'm very conscious of and I try to be grateful instead of seeing my signs of aging as flaws. I did get a cut today that's more flattering to my face by enhancing the good parts and concealing or even changing the appearance of things I'm less happy with but this sort of "cheating" keeps my mind of unflattering features and on stuff that's more important. Plus, I feel less frumpy when it looks like there's been put some consideration into my appearance.

I don't dress very vintage but it's only now that I'm confident enough in my style not to make excuses for the obvious thought put into my outfit regardless of which styles I mix. The whole point in returning to retro styles for the umpteent time in my short 32 years is that I was tired of feeling like I had to make excuses for making an effort with my appearance.

 

[goldwyn girl]

Life is too short to try to please others. Dress in the way that makes you feel best, whether it be vintage or not.

 

[MissHannah]

I'm with you GG - if looking smart makes you happy then dress smart. Equally, if not worrying about your clothes makes you happy then don't worry! Perhaps the reason some women become 'frumpy' as they get older is because their appearance isn't so important to them - they are freed from that preoccupation, and lucky them I say!

 

[cherry lips]

I'm with you GG - if looking smart makes you happy then dress smart. Equally, if not worrying about your clothes makes you happy then don't worry! Perhaps the reason some women become 'frumpy' as they get older is because their appearance isn't so important to them - they are freed from that preoccupation, and lucky them I say!

Very true. :eusa_clap :eusa_clap :eusa_clap :eusa_clap :eusa_clap:eusa_clap

P.S. I worry about aging too sometimes, just like I worry about... Death.

 

[cherry lips]

Moisturize,drink plenty of water to plump up your skin cells, & don't smoke or drink to excess.not only does the smoking deplete your cells of B6 but coupled with the drinking dehydrates you

Personally, drinking and smoking to excess on weekends makes me smile like a cheshire cat It has the same effect candy used to have when I was a kid. I'd rather be decadent than a well-preserved corpse. Fun reading on this topic: The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde.

 

[Lorena B]

Hi Brooksie, darling, do please accept my condolences for the loss of your dad.
i am also really sorry for your loss of job and boyfriend but think that these two ones can always be changed back for the best.

Oiharas darling, nice to see you back to the forum.
You see, after i read your post, you got me thinking.

I am currently 34, and mostly i am ok with it, but in the past as it will happen in the future, i have had times when i was feeling down and the fear of aging and the how i look in my vintage clothes has crept to make me doubt.
I must say that, despite of many of those " girl crisis" i am still wearing my vintage, i have stopped in some things like crinolines ( this was when i turned 21) but i am still wearing full skirts, my high waist jeans, and my 50's make up and hair are still there.

But i must ask When i have felt this way??
Well, when the date of my birthday is close, when the change of season ( specially from Summer to Fall), when i have gone trough difficult or stressful times or situations... ( well, i have gone through phases of not even feeling like putting on make up thou)

I have read that you have gone quite recently trough some difficult times, now you also have mentioned that your hair falls a lot and the most of the weeks you have no work.

Well, i think the reason of how you feel right now is there.

When you go though difficult times, your hair falls as your mood does too.
You feel uglier or older or fatter...you call it, and with the extra free time you start thinking too much in stuff.

I would like to "advice" you but i am no one to advice as ain't doctor or 100 years old but ... i would like to ask you to meet your friends, try to go out more ( and that not always cost money), try new things, stuff that makes you feel alive and get some energy back, have you tried mountain climbing, or going to an Ann Summers party, or just a girls party ( i have done this with a friend that got redundant, we end up putting crazy make up and back combing our hair and made pics of ourselves looking like a mad version of Cindy Lauper, hilarious and very uplifting as we didn't stop laughing.)
Also and not most importantly, eat healthy food, i am saying this because, during hard times people's eating habits change and here it is, you get an anemia, that help you to look tired, pale and helps your hair to fall or end up depressed, and this worsen up the fall of hair, and is cause of new and unnecessary wrinkles and in overall you end up seeing yourself worse.

I wouldn't take any action in my way of dressing yet, i will wait up and if in the close future you still feel the same about the ruffles and the pastel colors, then, (if it were me) i would take action.

I really hope things bright up for you soon lovely.

 

[chanteuseCarey]

Glad to see you back ohairas. Sorry to hear from you and Brooksie that life has been difficult for you both lately.

Yes, if you are feeling that you're no longer up for Civil War costuming or 50s vintage style, maybe it is time for trying on a different era, or two. Give up the spiky pointy heels and the hoop skirts! The 40s Lauren Bacall or a 30s Myrna Loy look might just be your ticket- give it a try! And what about maybe the Edwardian era too? You can still be glamorous and elegant in other eras than what you've become used to.

With all you've been through, I agree with other ladies posts here. Do your face and the rest of you a favor, start investing in really good quality skin care. The age you are at is a good time to start. Find a good aestetician and have her get you started with those lotions and potions! Taking care of your skin is a great way to be taking care of yourself in general. As the benefits of the skin care treatments become outwardly visible to you, you'll definitely feel better on the inside too.

I had to travel a long and often painful road to come to a place of acceptance about myself and who I was at that age (I'm now 51). I never thought I was interesting, even to myself until I was at least 30. Lots of stuff happened during that decade of my life; much of it not so good, much of it very good. During most of my 40s I was figuring out who I was on the inside. At 49 and 50, I learned I needed to care for the outside, to match how I felt about myself on the inside. I needed to learn to love myself as a unique, beautiful, and beloved creation of God (He doesn't make junk!). Now, I actively take care of myself far better than when I was younger, and as a result I feel I am aging well these days.

Find a pretty look for yourself where you are now in life- even if its a new vintage style. Learn a song you really love and sing it loudly with joy. Dance in the rain with someone that really matters to you; a child, a spouse, or a good friend. Don't "air hug" or "air kiss" anyone- show passion and authenticity. Play in the sunshine and walk barefoot in the sand- again. Lose ten pounds if you need to or put on ten pounds if you need to, if healing from stress that way is something that's necessary. Buy a fun hat, even if may look crazy to others and wear it proudly. Be a REAL friend to someone; that their life is now better for knowing you and your being in their life. Post some new pics of yourself in the "what are you wearing today?" thread when you are ready to-in vintage or not. Drink more water, eat really excellent dark chocolate. Life isn't always a bed of roses- but even when its not, do seek out those roses to smell just the same.

One thing that has been heavy on my mind is that I feel I have really aged in the last year. And I'm beginning to think I look ridiculous in my vintage garb (Not just vintage, but my costuming passion too.) I put on one of my Scarlett O'Hara gowns and think, who are you trying to kid?

I wish shorter, modern cuts "went" with vintage dresses. I've been inticed by a cute short haircut for months, but am just not ready. Being a hairdresser makes it harder!
I cut my shoulder length hair recently and HATE it. It needs to be SHORT or LONG, not in between. I also went brunette and HATED that too. The red is coming back.

Thoughts about aging and vintage?

 

[Celia Crowson]

As for aging - there was this lady that lived near-by whom I really admired, and she was in her late 70s.
[Sadly she past away a few years ago]
She always looked chic and elegant. She had that Audrey Hepburn 50s style - she may have been in her late 70s but it suited her to a T.

She is a great example that age does not matter when you have style and grace.

 

[C-dot]

I know what you mean! To me, Finnoula Flanagan epitomizes this:

I hope to look like her when I am her age!

 

[Foofoogal]

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20091027/lf_nm_life/us_mothers_ageing

looking like your mom lately?lol

 

[CherryWry]

small changes?

Ohairas and Brooksie, sorry you're both having such rough times...here's hoping things change for the better very soon.

I think it's perfectly natural for people to get bored with their style or need a change, whether it involves vintage or not. I know I've had clothes that I've loved to bits, then suddenly decided didn't suit me at all. Once every few years or so, I have a meltdown that lasts anywhere from a few days to a few weeks during which I hate my hair, all my clothes, shoes, makeup and jewelery. The semi-annual meltdown may also include hatred for my skin, jawline, butt and thighs.

To fight the freakout, I usually try to make small changes that feel different, like changing my hair color or style, or looking through clothes and combining things in different ways or switching one silhouette for another...for example, when I feel chunky, I'll swap pencil skirts for A-lines, or if I hate my skin, I'll try a new foundation or cleanser. Maybe I'll try wearing colors I don't normally wear. Sometimes shifting things a little at a time can keep you from feeling like you're stuck in a rut, without having the ohmygodwhatwasithinkingwhenithrewoutallmyclothesbecausenowihavenothigntowearandilostmyidentity crisis.

If a lot of things have changed for you recently and you don't feel like the same person on the inside, you may feel the need to look different on the outside, too. I think it may have more to do with life changes and rites or passage than with age.

Every time I've ended a long-term relationship, I've hacked my hair from shoulder-length into a lip-length bob...and LOVED it.

Sorry for rambling. Good luck finding the things that make you feel most you.