Want to buy or sell something? Check the classifieds
  • The Fedora Lounge is supported in part by commission earning affiliate links sitewide. Please support us by using them. You may learn more here.

Age difference between a man and a woman......

pennycarrol

A-List Customer
Messages
384
Location
France, UK
Ladies, I've just always wonder why there is so much controversy about a relationship between an older man and a younger woman?? And of course it's worse if it's the contrary/opposite (I mean an older woman with a younger man)!! Actually it happen to me, I really really like an older man (10-12 years older than me).. It's just hard to know how to react with someone older... Did it happen to you?? What do you think? Even if it gets better, our society is very conservative about that... I'm really happy to share my little story with you!!
 

RetroModelSari

Practically Family
Messages
863
Location
Duesseldorf/Germany
My men allways happened to be older than me, ranging from 7 -15 years difference. I don´t know, there must be something about me attracting guys in the age-range between 30 and 40, even when I was like 19 years old (twenty-somethings and younger never cared about me).

There were no real problems with the "society" exept one of them beeing embarrased of having a so much younger lover cause he thought people will think he took advantage of me. This is what made it all fail in the end, but it doesn´t necessarily has to be that way all the time. Not all men are like that, off course.

Anyway, my latest (and hopefully last) boyfriend is 7 years older. I personally think it doesn´t matter if your boyfriend is older or younger or the same age as you as long you are in love, get along well with each other and have similar priorities of your life and how you aspire it to be.
 

cemetarian

Vendor
Messages
79
Location
North of Dallas, Texas
I don't think it is an issue. Historically age has not been a factor in marriages or relationships. If two people relate to each other, who give a hairy rat's patoot what anyone else thinks?

My first husband was 6 1/2 years older (of course I was 16 and he was 21....LOL) and this one is 4 years younger and we've been married (mostly happily) for 35 years.......

If it feels right and is legal.....do it and don't worry about what society thinks.
 

pennycarrol

A-List Customer
Messages
384
Location
France, UK
Yes, it is true!! But you know, the difference is bigger between a woman who is 18 and a man who is 30... In my case I'm 28 and I think he' s 40... It's not the same.... And there is no differences between 45 and 55... That's my point of view... And RetroModelSari, everybody tell me that this man is 40, that he's too old, that he's going to cheat on me blah blah blah lol... I'm sure that there are some 40 years old interesting man lol!! My english isn't perfect sorry ladies!!
 

Lady Day

I'll Lock Up
Bartender
Messages
9,087
Location
Crummy town, USA
Men have historically been older than their wives. They generally had to provide a home for her to have children blah blah blah.

Its a bit more contemporary for a woman to be older than her husband. I see no problem either way. My parents had a 9 year age difference (father the older), so I always told my mother she cant get all bunched out of shape if I did the same thing.

My age or older is my general rule. But my age is my true preference. if Im gonna have a partner, I want one with a good chance of the same amount of life experiences. Age can be a good indicator of that.

LD
 

Rosie

One Too Many
Messages
1,827
Location
Bed Stuy, Brooklyn, NY
My dad was 21 years older than my mom.

I too, am mostly attracted to men who are older than me. They just seem to "get" me more.

The oldest guy I dated (rather briefly) was 22 years my senior. He was great but, I was/am looking to get married, have babies, and that was something he really wasn't interested in and was old enough to know he REALLY wasn't interested.

My current beau is all of 6.5 years older than me. Our idea of life is more in alignment with one another.
 

pigeon toe

One Too Many
Messages
1,328
Location
los angeles, ca
A lot of my friends who are in their early 20's are interested in or are dating older men. For me it's never been that way. I've always been interested in guys around my age, as long as they prove themselves to be mature (which, despite the stereotypes, isn't that hard to find). My boyfriend is about a year and a month older than me, which is hardly anything at all.

My mom is a year older than my father. Maybe that's why I'm not after older men!
 

Miss 1929

My Mail is Forwarded Here
Messages
3,397
Location
Oakland, California
Mostly older

I almost always dated older men (sometimes as much as twice my age!) as I found them to be much more polite, sensitive, grateful and interesting!
But then I married a man 6 months younger, who beats them all hollow at all of the above.
So go figure.
If you like the person, what does it matter what package they come in?
 

Dracca

One of the Regulars
Messages
126
Location
Texas
I have always dated older men. Really like someone else said, if it is legal, it really should not matter to anyone other than the two in the relationship.
 

pennycarrol

A-List Customer
Messages
384
Location
France, UK
Actually, I wasn't really attracted by older men it's just happened lol!! I saw him and I knew... It's weird because I met him 10 years ago when he worked in my high school (I was 18-19 years old).... 10 years later we met at uni... My friend told me "In life there's only appointements/rendez vous, that's fate..." !! We'll see...
But Lady Day I totally agree with you, it's great to have a partner with the same experiences etc...It frightens me a lot!!! I don't want him to be a mentor or something like that... Some of you had got relationships with older men... At the end, was it that kind of relationship (I mean the expert/the guide versus the innocent young woman)??
 

Jovan

Suspended
Messages
4,095
Location
Gainesville, Florida
I really don't mind either way. Some situations it's a teensy bit creepy in my opinion when the guy is like 40+ and the girl still in her late teens, like for Mr. Marilyn Manson and Miss Evan Rachel Wood and of course Bogart/Bacall and of course the other way around (which I can't find any examples of, just shows what I'm saying in the next paragraph)... but I digress. I've only really dated within a three year bracket, either way. Been attracted to plenty of women at least 5-10 years older than me, but that doesn't actually count of course.

What seems weird to me is how it's more generally acceptable for the man to be older but not the woman. A bit hypocritical.
 

Amy Jeanne

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,858
Location
Colorado
The biggest age gap for me was 20 (me) and 36 (him). We had nothing in common and it only lasted for 5 months. But that was just us; not saying that ALL relationships with large age differences will go awry. My aunt set us up and I think we were both a little lonely and desperate for someone. Our age difference may have been a factor for us not lasting, but I think it more had to do with the fact that was a redneck type and I was a little punkette at the time. As I said, NOTHING in common.

My current husband is 2 years younger me.
 

Gingerella72

A-List Customer
Messages
428
Location
Nebraska, USA
My husband is 6 years older than me, which is fine. The only thing I worry about is when we're old and gray, the possibility of him dying way before me (morbid to think about, I know, but it's a valid worry). I'd worry even more if the age gap were bigger.
 

LadyDeWinter

A-List Customer
Messages
466
Location
Berlin, Germany
Jovan said:
I really don't mind either way. Some situations it's a teensy bit creepy in my opinion when the guy is like 40+ and the girl still in her late teens, like for Mr. Marilyn Manson and Miss Evan Rachel Wood and of course Bogart/Bacall and of course the other way around (which I can't find any examples of, just shows what I'm saying in the next paragraph)... but I digress. I've only really dated within a three year bracket, either way. Been attracted to plenty of women at least 5-10 years older than me, but that doesn't actually count of course.

Isn't a good example for an older woman and a younger man Liz Taylor. I thing she had a husband who was lot younger then her.
 

GoldLeaf

A-List Customer
Messages
412
Location
Central NC
LadyDeWinter said:
Isn't a good example for an older woman and a younger man Liz Taylor. I thing she had a husband who was lot younger then her.

Didn't she have like, 20 husbands? lol Which one?
 

Fletch

I'll Lock Up
Messages
8,865
Location
Iowa - The Land That Stuff Forgot
The thing is to have an open mind and be into the person, not some role play deal. Susan Dey, the actress, used to have a rule that she only dated men at least 15 years older than she was. Call me judgmental, but that just says "issues" to me (be my dad, my boss, my mentor...stuff that doesn't really go with romantic intimacy).

I've dated women from 12 years younger to 15 years older - each extreme once. Most were a little younger than me.
 

pennycarrol

A-List Customer
Messages
384
Location
France, UK
In France we have a journalist (who is on tv for the news everyday) called Claire Chazal... She's dating at the moment a man who is 27 (She's nearly 50...)!! In every tabloid, newspaper you have photos about her and her young boyfriend... Wow, I think that's terrible... In the past, age difference wasn't such a big deal... Look at Mia Farrow and Frank Sinatra!!! Sorry but I don't have any exemple about women older than their husband in the 30's and 40's (I mean movie stars, well known people......)!!
 

nyx

One of the Regulars
Messages
268
Location
Cincinnati, OH
My father has been with my stepmother for almost 20 years. She's 13 years his junior and they've been very happy together. I do think that age is just a number. If you're happy, then it's a-ok.
 

Forum statistics

Threads
109,278
Messages
3,077,758
Members
54,221
Latest member
magyara
Top