Our Senior Centers

[LocktownDog]

I baked a BUNCH of cookies and brought them over to the senior center hoping to lift myself out of this funk I'm in. I met a young 80+ yr old woman who unfortunately had early onset of Alzheimers. She wasn't having a real good memory day. But she wanted to talk to me, so I sat there with her for 20 or so minutes "reminiscing". According to the attendant, her husband passed away a decade ago and they never had kids. I'm more depressed now than when I went in. lol

There are memories and histories being lost out there. I really don't want to think about myself (or anyone here) being in similar situations as a lot of these people. We often don't remember that nobody deserves to be alone, even if they're a stranger. We're all lost in this world. Just hold someone's hand and help them through it.

 

[LocktownDog]

Sorry for the rant. This just really hit me hard today.

 

[vitanola]

No need to apologise, OM. Some folks' humanity just lies nearer the surface. We live, in some way, as long as we are remembered, don't we? Your experience is a reminder that those of us who are childless yet must yet attemp to form strong relationships with the younger generation, if at all possible.

 

[rue]

First let me say that you are a very kind person for going to the senior center in the first place and even more for taking the time to listen to her. Most people would never take the time.

My grandfather had Alzheimer's and Parkinson's and both are absolutely dreadful diseases. I wish that I had been wise enough at 15, when he was relatively still coherent, to ask him everything I want to know now, but because I wasn't, most of the memories that he had died with him.

Be happy and proud that you took the time to listen, because that's all they really want is for someone to do just that.

 

[Maj.Nick Danger]

My mom once worked at a nursing home briefly. Very briefly, as in 2 weeks at the most. She just felt so bad every day for the terribly lonely people in that place.
Hats off to you Locktown for giving of yourself for those people. You will surely reap many benefits by just talking with them. They have many amazing stories to tell.

 

[Shangas]

My late grandmother, who died in November last year (97 years old), spent her last years in a nursing home with severe Alzheimers. It is a truly crippling disease. I know a lot of people say "I understand".

But seriously.

They don't.

Unless you have actually SEEN and LIVED with someone who has Alzheimers, you have NO real idea how bad it can be. It's like those Holocaust survivors who talk about Auschwitz. They can talk about it all they want to, and you can listen all you like. But you'll never fully understand until you experience it.

I used to go to my grandmother's nursing home and play the piano for her and the other old folks. Jazz songs from the 20s and 30s. Stuff thta they would recognise and sing along to. It made everyone happy.

 

[Connery]

I beleive you "touched" more people than you realize. Just by walking through those doors you made each person that saw you feel vital and necessary as many of these people do not have anybody that cares for them and visits. The woman that you spoke with truly lived through her discussion with you, as best as she could. You said that you wanted to be lifted from this "funk" you were in. I have never met a "funky" person who did what you have done and that was share and give of himself. Sometimes that which we seek is already within us. Perhaps you never had to go to this place to be lifted out of your funk, but, realize that any person who wishes to share their gifts with another is never in any funk for long...

 

[sheeplady]

Over the years my attitudes towards assisted living and nursing homes have changed somewhat.

On the one side, I don't agree with housing people by age or ability. I think it is incredibly damaging for society to say that a certain portion of the population can or should be isolated from the "rest of us." It says a lot about our values and ethics. I think it is sad that some people in these places feel isolated and lonely or they are forced to go live in such facilities because of their finances.

On the flip side, it is next to impossible to keep a loved one with certain serious chronic illnesses at home (in the US at least) unless there is a partner or child who can care for them full time or the person is pretty wealthy and can hire 24-hour nursing. It can also be very lonely when a person is homebound and has no interaction except for with their care agents or immediate family members (the same for a family caretaker). It is a hard path to take for both the older person and their family; and that is nothing to say of what it is like to care for a person with severe dementia.

I will always support better funding that allows people to live where they want to live- wherever that is. Many people want to stay in their homes but some actually look forward to moving into these facilities for the increased interaction. I think the key is that we need to integrate these facilities better into our communities. We also need to strongly reconsider how these facilities are managed and the opportunities available to the people who call them home. And residents should feel at home as much as possible.

 

[avedwards]

First of all, well done to the original poster for making the effort to visit the elderly and listen to them. I hope they liked your cookies .

I think it's a shame that too many elderly people are seen as a "liability" when people forget that it was their generation that shaped the world we live in today. I think more effort should be made to get younger people to spend time with them. For example, at my primary school we had a two day wood work project and everyone was invited to bring their grandparents in to help out and it was a fantastic way to get the children and the grandparents to interact.

 

[Miss Stella]

Along these lines, have you checked out
http://advancedstyle.blogspot.com/
Ari Seth Cohen has done such a great job showing us that those who are older have much to teach us, especially on the matter of style!

 

[I Adore Film Noir]

You made a very gracious and kind gesture to the residents and particularly to the lady.
It takes great courage to reach out to someone, well done ♥

 

[Wire9Vintage]

Yes. A lovely gesture that meant something all around and even here to all of us.

My daughters' 4H club always goes and does wandering carol singing at a different nursing home. The kids bring little gifts like lip balm or calendars and are encouraged to shake hands and such. It's always a great experience for everyone.

Seems this online community would be the perfect bunch to interact with these folks. Afterall, we know the lingo, the movies, the music, and most of their cultural references!