Looking for the lyrics to...

[Warbaby]

Something You Don't Expect
Recorded in the early-mid 1920s by Bert Williams

Life Gets Teejus (Tedious)
Recorded in the 1930s (I think) by Peter Lind Hayes

Both songs were spoken (like talking blues) rather than sung. I'm hoping that some of you vintage music buffs might either know the lyrics or have the records that you might be willing to transcribe. Extensive searching (and I'm very good at searching) on the net has turned up nothing.

I know the tunes and part of the lyrics from records that I heard at my grandparents when I was a kid. Wanderning around humming the melodies and a few words here and there and not remembering the lyrics is driving me nuts.

 

[Miss 1929]

And then send them to me so I can learn them!

 

[LizzieMaine]

Here's one of 'em -- music and lyrics by the early "hillbilly music" star Carson Robison, who also did a hit recording of the tune in 1948.

The sun comes up and the sun goes down
And the hands on the clock go round and roumd
I just wake up and it's time to lay down,
Life gets teejus, doon't it.

My shoe's untied, but, shucks, I don't care
Cuz I recon I ain't a-goin' nowhere,
I'd brush my teeth and comb my hair
Just too much wasted effort.

The water in the well get lower and lower,
Ain't had a bath in a month or more
I've heard it said and I'm sure it's true
That too much bathing will weaken you.

Danged ol' mule, he must be sick.
I jabbed him in the rump with a pin on a stick
He hunched his back, but he wouldn't kick
Something cock-eyed somewhere.

Hound dog's howling so forlorn
Laziest dawg that ever was born
He's howlin' 'cause he's settin' on a thorn
Just too tired to move over.

Well, the cow's gone dry and the hens won't lay
And my well dried up last Saturday
My troubles keep pilin' up day by day
And now I'm gettin' dandruff.

Roof's a-leakin' and the chimney leans,
An' there's a hole in the seat of my old blue jeans
Now I've et the last of the pork an' beans,
Just can't depend on nothin'

Mouse is gnawin' at the pantry door
He's been at it now for a month or more
When he gets through he'll sure be sore
Cause there ain't a dang thing in there.

Well, it's debts and taxes and pains and woes
Aches and miseries and that's how it goes
And now I'm getting a cold in my nose,
Life gets tasteless, don't it.

This was one of those songs where verse after verse after verse could be added for comic effect -- much like Robison's earlier hit, "Barnacle Bill The Sailor."

 

[Warbaby]

Oh, Lizzie, that was fantastic! Thank you, thank you, thank you! I owe you one big-time.

Now I can get busy learning the song and maybe get the other one out of my mind for awhile.