Another hat ? Really???

[Trevi007]

Guys I have been married for 19 years (I'm 42) and I usually buy stuff without consulting with the wife. But lately has been kind of hard to justify me buying more hats. It's a little difficult to justify having more than 40 hats and only 1 head . Don't get me wrong she loves how I look on my hats (or at least that's what she says ) and she has bought me some hats as gifts also. Before I used to say " babe they are different, different color, different brand , different shape , different materials....etc) but right now I'm running out of excuses lol. I'm down to ..."babe is for my Dad (she loves my Dad, and yes he's a hat guy also) " . So now every 3 hats one is for my Dad, lucky guy ... Hahaha. Anyways I am curious how you Guys do it, and what's your dilemma? This is going to be fun.... Lets hear it!

 

[belfastboy]

I used to collect mountain bikes (I have a garage full!) so she is acclimated to my weirdness. Now with the hats (20 and growing) she says..."at least they take up less room than the bikes!" I am slowly selling off my bikes to pay for my hat habit.

 

[tropicalbob]

Go to a dermatologist. Ask him if you should wear a hat. He'll say yes, and then you can tell her,"Doctor's orders!" This is good for a number of hats: at least five or six straws for different occasions, outfits, weather conditions, etc. You can then work basically the same strategy with fur felts.

 

[Lean'n'mean]

I'm not a collector as such ( my bank balance sees to that ) but when buying yet another new (old) hat I first have to pursuade myself that it's a good idea. Being someone who tries to focus on my needs & not my wants I 'm a pretty hard nut to crack when it comes to buying non essential luxuries .......however,once the devil who sits upon my right shoulder has convinced me that I must have that particular hat, pulling the wool over the wife's eyes is pretty easy, she can see the money has gone but she doesn't always know what on........& if she should see me wearing a new hat, she will first give a surprised expression & then a knowing smile will radiate from her beautiful face (shame about the rest ) as the penny drops. I suspect though that she probably considers me as mad as a hatter

 

[Frunobulax]

My wife asked me last night how many I had. She hadn't asked that in a while. I told her, "north of 30," but I would have to stop and think, actually.

 

[RJR]

My wife quit asking BUT I see her closet of blouses growing .

 

[hatsRme]

Maybe from a dream, but I seem to recall a thread some years ago titled "What to tell your wife when she asks if you got another hat." It's an age-old topic, and yes, fun to swap strategies!

 

[hatophile]

My wife is very patient and understanding of my hat collection, but sometimes even she asks that question "What, another hat?". At that point, I simply refer to her shoe and pocketbook collections. That usually does the trick.

 

[Motorcyclist]

My wife has a shoe habit so I'm just working at the opposite end. Of course we do have a budget each month and we have our own blow money for whatever we want to get so it's really not much of an issue.. She does sometimes ask that same question though... Another hat? One day I'll counter with "another order from zappos?"

 

[emigran]

I'M SINGLE... and the neighbors can't really tell when I get a new one...

 

[moontheloon]

married only 5 years

I have other collection addictions so my wife always gets concerned when boxes start piling up

but collections in the past have paid for vacations , cleared debt , payed for classes, bought a car , among other things when I purged them usually in a lot ... so I have that on my side

I also collect vintage Gretsch drums ... so hats are very cheap in comparison

a $150 to $300 hat is not that big of a dent when considering a drum kit is usually between $1500 and $4000

still it is money though ... and we are not wealthy by any stretch of the imagination

I do make an ok living as a musician ...

my wife is a musician as well who is not very interested in shoes and bags like most women ... so I cannot do what most of my friends do and buy a nice pair of shoes or a hand bag and call it even

my wife likes my hats ... she loves most things vintage like I do

but she does shake her head at the 40+ hat boxes in my studio / office

but she doesn't shake her head when I sell a few and make her credit card payments and clear a bunch of her debt

we have a nice balance going

I also get some mileage out of saying that these hats and drums could one day pay for a year of college for our daughter and that is it indeed like having money in the bank

when I was younger I had a mild drug problem ... completely clean now aside from the occasional beer ... so I also get mileage out of saying something like ... hey it could be a much worse addiction

so life is good

 

[EstherWeis]

Haha, other way around here

He goes, really! Did you really order more black felt? Don't you have 12000 black hats already?
I'm lucky that most are stocked in a room in the workshop. So he has no idea really.
And i do make them all myself, so the money aspect is still different.
But you know, order 3 hoods and some ribbon etc. it all ads up.
Then again, i surprise him with a new hat from time to time.

We are lucky that my husband has a pretty good job ( I work partly self employed and i manage a jewelry store)

childcare, healthcare, education is all affordable in Belgium.

No crazy shoe/clothes,/ bag addiction.
I spend the most on food if I think about it.
Good wine, nice cheese and all that jazz.
I like to cook so i tend to buy the expensive stuff.

But you can't eat shoes so that's okay right?!?


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[Knotten]

I tell my wife this is my mid-life crisis, and as far as that goes, I could be collecting things a lot worse for our marriage.

 

[javadave61]

I have found that one word helps: "hobby." I tell her, this is my hobby. Hobbies are designed to be irrational and not always make sense. She and I both have jobs in the world of care-giving, and that can be exhausting, so hobbies can help gets our minds off the things we deal with every day.

Otherwise, it's "don't ask, don't tell" around my house!

 

[hatsRme]

I tell my wife this is my mid-life crisis, and as far as that goes, I could be collecting things a lot worse for our marriage.

That was my approach, too, Knotten. My MLC, I proclaimed! And, yup, hats are cheaper than cars, and, of course women!

 

[Ordinary Guy]

Not married....NO problem,,,, lots of hats

 

[Trevi007]

My wife asked me last night how many I had. She hadn't asked that in a while. I told her, "north of 30," but I would have to stop and think, actually.

Lol my wife always ask " how many do you have?" And I always says like 20 , but she found out last week that there are 2 and sometimes 3 in each box...

 

[Frunobulax]

Lol my wife always ask " how many do you have?" And I always says like 20 , but she found out last week that there are 2 and sometimes 3 in each box...

I don't have much in the way of hobbies, though I've tried a few. She no longer lets me go near Bonsai trees because I've murdered so many. Woodworking is only for jobs I need to do. I love to cook, so there's that, but that's just making the best of a necessity. I like firearms and going to the range, but my desire for "collecting" them didn't extend beyond the few I've gotten over the years - plus, they're much more pricey than hats.

So I've gotten into this. She hasn't complained, but I think she doesn't always "get it," either.

 

[DesertDan]

I still have more bass guitars than hats, though that gap is closing.
On the rare occasion she says anything I just tell her to be glad I'm not into hotrods!

 

[Genuine Classic Gangster]

I'm not married, but I've dated women who tried to make me stop wearing fedoras simply because they think wearing them makes a man look uncool and they didn't want to be 'embarrassed' in front of their friends/relatives etc. who share the same opinion.

When that happens, I always choose my fedoras over those women. If I participate in a relationship, the woman will have to accept that fedoras are part of my soul, and never shall they and I be separated. Otherwise, I walk away from that relationship.

However, I can see how continuing to buy an extreme amount of fedoras while in a marriage relationship might possibly be a tad inappropriate. That is to say, a woman who does not accept fedoras does not seem to be the same as the OP's woman, who does seem to accept fedoras - so I wouldn't apply the thoughts I've given in this post to the OP's particular type of situation.